Back in the Saddle

Greetings all,

It’s been a while since I have posted.. First I fractured my right leg and being 70+ does not lend a helping hand in healing.   Then I had to go back to Flippin, AR to help an old friend recover from a nasty bout with melanoma.  Luckily she is doing great.  I have noticed some new ones like AliceOttley, CathyG, roofy9987 and many others.  Hopefully I can hang around a while.

Emily

Welcome back, Emily!

Guess you were born a year before me. I’m 72 now born in 1946.

Howdy CathyG,

The “development” took many years. Some suggest it was a coping mechanism and maybe it was, but there was more too it.  The first signs were tingly feelings “down there” that seemed to surface just after getting one.   My uncle, the perverted one, did not spank with a lot of force, but he spanked for a longer time.  As time when on I found myself also liking to observe others get it.  This was especially true at school as I got to see folks other than relatives get it.  I almost never misbehaved to get one, but at the same time it was not much of a deterrent.  In jr high I discovered a boy at school, David, who admitted hearing about spankings made him excited, and we became close friends for a year or two until he became interested in other girls.  I later discovered I was a “submissive” type which is why authority added to the “like.”   It was not until I was my 50’s and got online for the first time that I discovered this interest was more common and universal than I ever imagined.

Emily

Remind me Emily, did your uncle spank you as an uncle at home, or just as a principal at school. And he spanked less hard but longer. How many strokes in an average session and what was the worst?

stujos wrote:Remind me Emily, did your uncle spank you as an uncle at home, or just as a principal at school. And he spanked less hard but longer. How many strokes in an average session and what was the worst?

My uncle was not a principal.  The principal was a Mr. Anderson.  My dad left my mom and was never heard from until many years later.  My uncle raised us and his family.  He would spank for a longer time and it would last 3 to 5 minutes.

Emily

Emily, is that at home and at school, or were you treated differently at both? I take it that, as the smacks were not extremely hard, they were just about bearable pain-wise. It was the embarrassment that “hurt” the most. Did he lecture between strokes, or was it non-stop? He was clearly a pervert, anyhow. That is just how I like to spank consensually, a large number of spanks spread over a period of time, with breaks for “other things” as well!

I got it in both places.  My uncle was an out and out pervert and Mr. Anderson was somewhat of one.  My uncle would expect you to lie prone over his lap and get two or three minutes of hand whacks with little or no fuss.  Mr. Anderson might swat you 10 or 15 times but not real hard, just enough to make your butt sting and he would talk here and there during it.

Emily, it seems you just couldn’t avoid it, home or school. I presume your uncle spanked you bare-bottomed at home, but what about at school? And surely Mr Anderson would not have had the audacity to lower your knickers in school?

It is amazing what youngsters put up with back in the day, compared with now. I have mentioned in other posts that I got involved with a young lady who had been both physically and sexually abused by her stepfather. She also had a congenital heart condition, which meant that growing up she spent a lot of time at home and didn’t have many friends. I asked her why she didn’t tell someone about her ordeal. She replied that she didn’t know any different, she thought all families were like hers.

stujos wrote:Emily, it seems you just couldn’t avoid it, home or school. I presume your uncle spanked you bare-bottomed at home, but what about at school? And surely Mr Anderson would not have had the audacity to lower your knickers in school?

It is amazing what youngsters put up with back in the day, compared with now. I have mentioned in other posts that I got involved with a young lady who had been both physically and sexually abused by her stepfather. She also had a congenital heart condition, which meant that growing up she spent a lot of time at home and didn’t have many friends. I asked her why she didn’t tell someone about her ordeal. She replied that she didn’t know any different, she thought all families were like hers.

It’s true I could not avoid it, or most of it, and yes he did spank on the bare bottom.   Mr. Anderson never spanked on the bare bottom, but he did lift your dress before spanking you.

Your assessment of your lady friend is correct, you didn’t talk about those things, because you thought it happened in other families.  No one knew what being perverted was because the word was never used.  A friend at school told me they got in the nude and when the spankings were over, they had to do chores, mostly laundry, in the buff.  I first realized my uncle was weird when I was almost 30.  I wondered why when we got spanked on a Sunday after church, we had to take off our dresses and stand there in shoes, socks and panties.  And when it was your turn, he pulled the panties down before going over his lap.

When it became crystal clear what he was occurred after he dies.  He left behind a good hunk of money and also some undesirables.  He had a notebook where he wrote spanking stories and it was quite clear many were about us.  But the most shocking part, and this is the first time I have mentioned it, is he had about 25 reels of old 8 mm film.  My cousin Donna, who is a year older than I, told us “We knew daddy had taken some films of us the 50’s, but I was only aware of the 8 we had that mom had given us.  He told us it was too much trouble to process the films, so he eventually quit using it, or so we thought.”  Around 1980 or so she acquired an old 8 mm projector she found at an estate sale.  I’ll never forget the sound in her voice when she called and said to come over.

Those 25 reels consisted of some really bad stuff.  First was a few crude attempts to make a stag film with my aunt (you can never un-see that), but 16 of them were films of him spanking us.  We had all seen the little camera on the tripod that was in his room, nut we never imagines it was in use when we got it.  Those films reminded me how much he seemed to like what he was doing.  After pushing you over his lap, he seemed so focused on the task at hand.  Although they were silent films, I could hear the smacks in my head as we watched them.    He was one real bent individual.

Mr. Anderson never did anything like that, although he admitted later on, when I went to see him when I was 19/20, that he did find spankings “interesting.”   I actually have fond memories of Mr. Anderson and I loathe my uncle.

Emily

Oh Emily, what a shocking story, and how brave of you to relate it here for the first time. You certainly didn’t need to, so I wonder if it helps a little to lift the burden. You are one amazing lady to have come out of it as well as you have. I’m not sure pervert is a strong enough word in your uncle’s case. Did no-one else in the family know what was going on?

From what you say, your abuse was “only” physical. In my girl’s case, it was sexual as well, probably from age 7. It ended with her getting severe PTSD, which manifested itself often in our relationship. On more than one occasion I kept her talking on the phone in the middle of the night because she had overdosed. Unfortunately, she still passed away in her late 20s, although with her heart condition, she didn’t expect to last that long.

The problem was, her father was considered a pillar of the Community, high up in local and national politics, When she did come out in later years, no-one other than her grandfather believed her, and when he died, she was left with no-one other than me. Does this sound familiar to you?

If you, or anyone else, want to know more about what this girl endured, may I recommend a book she wrote (she was a budding author, due to the time she spent at home growing up). Although technically fiction, it is actually a microcosm of her life. It’s called Wednesday’s Child and her name is Amanda Hewett. I think it can still be found on Amazon. I defy you to read it and not cry. .

Thank you stujos.  The dilemma in my mind is caused by the fact that I did develop a liking for spanking, or more accurately, the after effects.  It may have been a form of a coping mechanism to some degree.  Either because of the way I was born or grew up, I became a sub type when I was still young.  I was fascinated watching the others get it even though I knew they were in discomfort.  Being told to bend over or being told “good girl” was a very strange but very real excitement and fear at the same time.  As weird as it sound, I came to loathe my uncle once I came to understand the whole situation.  Had I remained in the dark on the matter, I may have just found him an irritant.

I will check into the book to see what it is about.   The human psyche is really strange at times.

Touche, Emily. Amanda was exactly the same. I originally met her via a spanking contact site, although I thought she was just a professional submissive, and we did have some good spanking times together, when she was well enough. I found out later that she was actually being “run” by a guy whom she went to live with when she eventually escaped her stepfather’s clutches, who also did all sorts of nasty things to her. Towards the end I realised he was actually part of her stepfather’s circle. I think when she died was the last time I really cried. Life can be a bitch, can’t it?

Yes, it can.  My upbringing did not affect me too negatively, but it affected my sisters and cousins more.

CathyG wrote:I think those who received many spankings as a kid are affected more than anyone really realize.  The fact there are so many forums and spanking fetish type sites will attest to that.

i agree..  how many times have you heard the line i was spanked and turned out fine…what amazes me is the high number of people in forums and spanking sites that were never spanked growing up.

I’m inclined to think there are many categories here. Those who, themselves, received school and/or home discipline in the past. Then we have those of around the same age who escaped it and now almost regret their ‘luck”. The younger bunch, in the UK, those over about 45 now and wonder what it would have been like. Then we have those who, I believe, were born with the interest!

On the other hand there are tens of thousands who felt juvenile CP and just accepted it as just that and have no interest whatsoever in it since,

six of the best wrote:I’m inclined to think there are many categories here. Those who, themselves, received school and/or home discipline in the past. Then we have those of around the same age who escaped it and now almost regret their ‘luck”. The younger bunch, in the UK, those over about 45 now and wonder what it would have been like. Then we have those who, I believe, were born with the interest!

On the other hand there are tens of thousands who felt juvenile CP and just accepted it as just that and have no interest whatsoever in it since,

Six,

You have me thinking about the line “born with the interest.”  I had always assumed my interest was just a coping mechanism I developed to make the situation less stressful, but in light of reading about many who are interested but never receive it, makes me think it could have been in my genetic makeup.

Emily1945:

Can I take the liberty of assuming you were born in 1945. I, myself, was born the following year!  When I grew up spanking at home and school corporal punishment was the accepted way of disciplining naughty youngsters. That’s not to say every youngster was spanked though. Many parents even then didn’t use it and nor did some schools. However the great majority did. We had to as you said ‘cope’. At home I was rarely spanked but on those occasions I bent over when I was told.

All that said I am certain that my interest lies deeper than that. From reading posts here I realise that the interest is more widespread than most would think.

Yes, I was born in August 1945.  I’ll soon be 74, wow!

When I grew up, like you, corporal punishment was the accepted way of handing disobedient kids. However, I was not aware of any parents who did not use at least sometimes, and every school I knew about it used it, and that continues today, although it is much more controlled and monitored.  I recall times where we talked about spankings with other kids and intrigued and sometimes shocked at others encounters.

You are correct that the interest is much more common than one would believe.   My discussions with another schoolmate during my jr high years helped me to understand I was not the only one and boys were affected differently by this interest than girls. That summer of 1957 is something I have never forgotten.

Emily

Whereabouts did you go to school Emily? I presume your parents spanked you at home too.

I went to school in Arkansas.  Yes, I was spanked at home by my uncle who became my surrogate dad when daddy left my mom when we were quite young.   He was the perverted one I spoke about earlier in this thread.  I did not know it at the time, but me, my siblings and cousins were used to get feed his kink.  No actual sex acts, just spankings.

Emily