I spent a moment weighing up the odds. “Do I have to wear my underwear too?”
“Well I think you should wear some underwear.” Mum replied. “But which you wear is up to you.” she smiled.
“I think Pete should put the kettle on whilst we find him something… then I’ll make us a brew whilst he’s getting changed.” my sister suggested. “OK?”
“OK.” I gulped. “Just… nothing really girlie.”
“I know.” Hannah replied. “Do you want thick or thin tights?”
“Thick… and black… please.” My hands were shaking as I filled the kettle. It slowly erupted into a boil as I waited for my mother and sister to return. I could her their distant voices as they root and rummage through Hannah’s old clothes. Mum was always pestering her to have a clear out of all the stuff she’s outgrown and when Hannah does have an occasional clear out, the boxed and bagged clothes always end up in the spare room rather than at the charity shop as was the plan. I know. I’ve rummaged enough times myself. That’s where I found her old tap dancing leotard. I recall how excited I felt when I discovered that the little skirt was attached to it and not a separate item, and how disappointed I was when I couldn’t find and white tights to wear with it.
“Right, there’s some things on your bed.” Hannah said as she bounded into the kitchen. “I dug out a few pairs of shorts so wear whichever you like or fit the best… and there’s a couple of tops and a vest.”
“OK.” I timidly said “Thanks.” I added, just as timidly. Mum entered as I left and smiled knowingly at me. I forced a smile back as I headed up to my room. On my bed is three pairs of denim shorts. Being typical girl’s shorts, they’re all very short; one is dark blue with a high waist and turned up hems and one is a paler stonewashed blue. Both have ‘western’ style pockets front and back whilst the third pair has little back pockets on the front and no pockets on the back. A pair of black tights is loosely draped over the tops she mentioned. I’m more than a little chuffed to find a Nirvana ‘drunken smiley’ T shirt. The other tee is a verdant green with capped sleeves and a broad ‘boat’ neck. Printed on the front is a Converse logo and also meets my approval… but not so much as the Nirvana tee. I glance at the unwanted gift and wonder whether I want it or not. I decide to leave it untouched for now and pull on the vest she’d left. Plain black with spaghetti straps and a narrow band of lace trim along the top edge. I kick off my converse plimsolls and perch on my bed, pulling off my jeans and socks in one boyish motion. This is by no means the first time I’ve pulled on a pair of tights but it’s the first time I’ve had permission. I slide them up my legs and settle the waistband before venturing into new territory… short denim shorts. I knew they were there in the bags of cast offs but it never once crossed my mind to try them. I step into the first pair and pull them up. The waist is high and tight, but there is some stretch. Their short legs hug my thighs and my nylon clad legs look long and shapely. I toy with trying the other two pairs but decide against it. I don’t want my mother and sister thinking I’m up here modelling and considering each item before choosing my favourite. I push my feet back into my converse trainers before briefly considering wearing the green tee shirt. I stick to my guns and pull on my sister’s old Nirvana tee shirt before having second thoughts. It has those little ‘angel’ sleeves and a lettuce edge around the waist. “Nah it’ll do.” I tell myself as I look down at my skinny fit tee, little fitted shorts and long black legs.