Gina came running into her bedroom at the sound of my bellow and said apologetically, “I’m so sorry! It was all they had that would fit you except diapers. Do you want to wear diapers instead?”
“No, I don’t want to wear diapers!”, I replied in disgust.
Gina looked worried and said hesitantly, “Are you sure? The doctor’s orders said you should wear diapers until you get potty trained again. The care instructions specifically say that if you try to wear training pants before you get potty trained the pants will hold your poop next to your skin and give you a bad case of diaper rash. Are you sure you want to wear them?”
“I’m sure,” I told her disgustedly.
“Promise me you’ll wear diapers if you get diaper rash! Please?”, she pleaded.
“NO!”, I said with an air of finality.
“But I’ll get in trouble with your doctor! Pretty please with sugar on it?”
“No!”, I said.
“Pleaaaaase?”, she pleaded.
“Alright, alright! If I get diaper rash, I’ll wear diapers. Will that make you happy?”, I asked in exasperation.
“I’m just trying to take care of you,” she said with a hurt tone in her voice.
“I know and I’m sorry,” I said contritely, “It’s just that…..It’s just that it’s hard to get used to the fact that my body has changed, Gina. A week ago I was a full professor at the University and now look at me! I look like a toddler!”
“I think you look cute!”, Gina said in a feeble attempt to make me feel better.
“I don’t want to look cute! I want to look like my old self!”, I complained loudly.
“I know you do. I wish I could do something to help you,” she offered sincerely.
“Why don’t you get us something to eat? I’m starved!”, I told her.
“Oh! Whatever happened to the time? I’m sorry, I’ll make dinner right away,” she said distractedly.