“Now’s the time to strike,” she thought as she verbally demanded in the most maternal, patronizing voice she knew, “Andy!! Have you been a naughty baby? Did you go poo-poo in your diapers? Aunt Krystyn saw the look on your face a minute ago! You looked like you were enjoying yourself! I was right to turn you into an infant! You really like making messes in your pants! I saw the ‘skid marks’ on your underwear when I picked them up. You never had any business wearing ‘big boy’ underwear, did you? You should have been in diapers all along! You don’t need a girlfriend, you need a mommy! Well, that’s water over the bridge now. You’re back in your proper place, wearing the kind of clothes that are appropriate for your behavior.

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