“Well Jordan just told me about it last night when she was at the hospital – you know we talked on the phone for a long long time right? I think she was like terrified I was going to quit being her friend or something crazy. She’s all stress and embarrassed about it like it’s this terrible secret. The worst part for her is she had to wear a diaper last night and her mom’s been making her wear pull-ups at home so she won’t wreck the mattress; which of course she’s embarrassed about.”

“I see,” Jo said as they pulled onto 99 south headed toward downtown, “you haven’t said where you want to eat by the way.”

“I don’t care mom, you pick. Anyways, so when we got this invitation today Jordan just went on and on about how she couldn’t possibly go to this party because everyone would find out about her secret problem and then they’d hate her even more. And Moom—It’s just not true!! I don’t believe it! Those are nice girls!! Georgia is so sweet. And all her friends!! They’re not like Nicole and Amber and the rest of those twats.”

“Watch your mouth young lady!” Jo probably would’ve used the same word herself but she had to at least act like a responsible mother.

“Sorry – but they are.”

Jo glared at her.

“Anyways, I’m pretty much Jordan’s only friend and she keeps doing things like this to alienate herself from other friendships. I’m really worried about her. All she does is stay in her room and write those silly stories. I mean, we hang out and stuff and I love her because she’s so smart and funny and creative – but I’m worried she’s gonna drive herself crazy by how serious she is. Like – could that be causing this bedwetting thing in the first place?!”

“So that’s why you’re so upset…you’re not so much worried about Georgia’s feelings as you are worried about Jordan…”

“I guess so.” They were crossing the bridge over the causeway connecting Puget Sound with Lake Union. Alex looked out and saw a ferry headed to the Island across bay.

“Listen honey – Jordan’s got to find her own way in life…she’s got to make her own decisions and she’s got to make her own mistakes. It’s thoughtful of you to care about how you think she’s screwing up – and it’s thoughtful of you to give her advice – but in the end, she gets to decide and you need to continue to be a good friend and stick with her.” Jo wouldn’t have been able to give this kind of calm advice before the intervention with her husband but that experience had taught her a ton about relationships and boundaries.

She continued, “Because she’s so young, and because I’m personal friends with Sally, I’ll mention it to her – but that’s all the more any of us can do at this point.”

Alex felt frustrated. She continued to look out the window.

“But as for you – you need to find a way to let this go. You are not your friend. YOU are not JORDAN. You make your own decisions and so does she. And you can still love her and be her friend….right?

“Right mom…” Alex knew she was right; as far as she could understand this mumbo jumbo. Jordan and what she considered to be her anti-social ways still frightened Alex – and this bedwetting thing just seemed like an excuse to stay home more.