Ella stood, feeling awkward as she watched Dr. Lawson lower the table. “Go ahead and lie down on your back. Paige will be coming in just a moment, ah, here she is.” The nurse practitioner from earlier stuck her head in. “Please come in, I need to examine Miss Marsh here.” Once she heard the door close he continued. “Isabella, would you be okay if I took a quick look? I promise I will be very gentle and very fast.” She looked at him uneasily. In her experience, whenever someone said they’d be gentle, they were usually far from it. She looked at Heather, looking for some kind of sign as to what she should do.
“It’s okay, Ella, go on. He just wants to make sure you’re not hurt anywhere.” Ella grimaced, but nodded her consent before lying on her back.
“Now i’m just going to push your gown up a bit, there we go.” She heard a sudden ripping noise as her soggy pull-up was taken off and thrown in the trash. She grimaced as the cold air chilled her bottom half. “Is she having trouble controlling her bladder and bowels, mom?” He asked as he took some wipes from a drawer and began cleaning her.
“I’m not sure to be honest. The hospital sent her home in diapers and she’s been using them so far, well reluctantly.” Heather answered. “I think it’s because she’s afraid.”
“I wouldn’t suggest it.” The doctor said, throwing the wipes away. “I think it will do her more harm than good. She might regress, or become dependent on them. Our end goal is to get her used to the idea of the restroom. We want to show her, no matter what may have happened in her past, she is safe. What we don’t want is to encourage her to go whenever, and wherever she is.”
“So then what do I do if she won’t use the restroom? We can’t have her having accidents all over the house.”
“Well, there’s a good chance there will be accidents. Bed wetting is quite common in children following a big life change. So if you wanted to keep her in pull ups overnight, that would be understandable, but for the day, it would be better to use some kind of container. A bucket even would be better than a diaper. As long as she is associating a specific item and place she can…eliminate. I think the key here is safety. Maybe once she feels safe and in a routine, you can begin moving closer and closer until eventually you have her inside the bathroom. Then ultimately she won’t need it.
It’s like someone who avoids public restrooms because of germs; it all comes down to their personal safety. Even I have avoided quite a few unsanitary gas station restrooms in my time. Eliminating waste, across all species, drastically requires letting your guard down and for some unknown reason, Isabella here does not associate restrooms as a safe place where she can let her guard down.”