Under the headline
Arsonist Destroys Pavilion
the fire brigade confirmed that the fire had been started deliberately but I didn’t intend to burn it down.
The pavilion had been boarded up for years.
I’d broken in and was getting stoned alone when a combination of stupidity and recklessness meant the small fire I’d lit for no particular reason quickly got out of hand and I scarpered.
According to the newspaper report,
the police had fingerprint evidence but the culprit wasn’t on their database,
so they were asking for any witnesses to come forward so the offender could be found and prosecuted.
The evidence would have been the stash tin that I’d left when I ran.
If a rumor got out that I was involved,
they’d come and take my fingerprints which would link me to the tin and I’d have to come clean about starting the fire…
then I really would be in deep shit.
I’d have a criminal record for arson,
and for possession, and possibly for breaking and entering too…
I’d have to pay a fine and do several hundred hours of community service and might even face a custodial sentence.
Compared to all that, changing my profile picture and putting up with all the offensive and abusive comments that followed was nothing.
It was a few months after the fire that I told Laura, and I trusted that she wouldn’t tell anyone.
However, what I didn’t expect was for her to make me ‘buy’ her silence.
At first I thought she’d want money and when she said it would be a forfeit of some sort, I agreed.
She spent a couple of days thinking before she told me that she wanted to dress me up as a girl.
It didn’t sound like much of a forfeit.
I thought she’d have me doing all her chores or have me at her beck and call or something.
I figured she thought the idea would fill me with dread, but it didn’t really,
and after seeking Laura’s assurance that she wouldn’t make me go out of the house, I agreed.
She put me in a bra and gave me a cute little top to wear.
She spent ages doing my hair and make-up and to be honest, I enjoyed being pampered.
A necklace and bracelet and a barrette in my hair and finally I got to see my reflection.
I couldn’t believe my eyes.
I was fit! I didn’t think I’d look as good as I did.
I almost fancied myself. Laura told me that I should take a selfie and thinking little of it,
I grabbed my phone,
stood in front of the mirror, framed myself and took a photograph.
In fact I took about ten and Laura chose the one she liked the best and deleted the rest,
then she told me what my actual forfeit was;
changing my profile picture on FaceBank to one of me dressed as a girl…
and the photo had to stay on FaceBank for a month and not a day less.
I should have known that there’d be more to her forfeit than a simple make-over!
At first, I flat refused/
However given the choice between everyone seeing me dressed as a girl on FaceBank, or everyone seeing me on the front page of the Evening News when the police charge me with arson…
I felt I had no choice but to upload the picture to FaceBank and within minutes the comments began.