“Clark,” Beouf called. “Snack time. Time to sit down.”

“Yeah, Clark.” Billy mocked. “Go sit down.”

Chaz threw Billy the dirtiest of looks. “Come on man…”

“What are you gonna do?” Billy asked. “Tell the teacher on me?”

I backed away. The fight wasn’t worth it. Not here. Not now. Not yet. Unless some miracle happened, I was gonna be back here tomorrow. This was a tomorrow fight.

I had to get through today.

A tiny but incredibly strong hand grabbed me the wrist and dragged me the rest of the way back to the activity table. “You can sit with me, Clark!” As if I had a choice, socially or physically.

Old instincts came to the surface in Ivy’s Iron grip. “Pull your chair out for you?” I asked.

The doll’s eyes lit up. She let me go and bounced on the balls of her feet. “Yes please!” She lightly clapped her hands.

I pulled the chair out for her. “Here ya go.”

“My my. Such a gentleman.” Ivy said, plopping down. “That’s what Mommy says to Daddy when he ‘members to pull her chair out for her.”

I rubbed my wrist. Was that a bruise? “Just being polite.”
Napkins and graham crackers followed. “Yummy.”

I picked one up and nibbled at it. If snack time was anything like breakfast, I’d be expected to finish. Might as well. Not bad. Kind of bland. Kind of sweet. In the back of my mind I remembered a little factoid that whoever invented this honey flavored cardboard did it as a way to reduce sexual urges and discourage masturbation. Yup. That tracked being served in this room.

“Ivy,” I said. “Do you normally sit by yourself at snack time?”

Ivy took a giant bite and then swallowed. “Not all the time. Lots of kids sit by me.” Bits of crumbs tumbled out of her mouth.

I frowned. “So it’s me?” I’m not sure why that made me feel bad. It wasn’t her fault that she was as far gone as she was. Even in prison, you had to have friends.

“Nuh-uh.” Ivy said. “It’s just all my old bestest friends went to another daycare. We still get to play sometimes, but they don’t go here anymore.”

I took another bite. “Why’d they leave?”

“They learned how to be good babies. Mommy says Mrs. Beouf has a waiting list. I only get to stay because Mommy works here.”

That was a weird thought: Ivy was a kind of regression litmus test. The better a captured Little got on with her, the more likely they were to have gotten with the program. Only people broken down into forever toddlers and eternal infants could get along in earnest.

Another disturbing thought. Ivy was a catalyst. Exposure to a fully mind fucked Little hastened the breakdown.

“But your Mommy works here too,” she said. “So you’re not gonna have to leave, either. We can be best friends forever.”

The crackers weren’t nearly as palatable all of a sudden.

Beouf milled around and refilled bottles with water. She was also carrying around a container of flavoring. Turning plain water into punch. A treat. When she came to me she asked, “Clark, would you like some cherry added to your bottle?”

She had a clear plastic cup with her, also filled with water. Before I could reply she squirted some in and drank from the cup herself. She smiled slyly.

Damn her. Damn her for anticipating my paranoia and disproving it immediately. Damn her for attempting to de-escalate before I even had a chance to object. It was exactly the sort of thing I would have done for one of my students if they were weary about a new food.

“If you don’t like the taste, you don’t have to drink it all. Just try.”

Damn her for being a good teacher.

I sighed. “Fine.”

“Here, we say, ‘Yes please.’” she chirped.

Typical. “Yes, please.”

She squirted some in and then rescrewed the top on the bottle. I took a sip, my lips getting used to the feeling of pulling on the rubber nipple.

“It’s yummy, isn’t it?” Ivy asked. I nodded and kept drinking. Besides (hopefully) ensuring that I’d get some measure of modesty back before lunch, drinking made it so I didn’t have to talk to her too much.

I hoped that crying kid was okay. Maybe he was just sick. Maybe they called his parents and he went home for the rest of the day.

Mrs. Zoge popped up behind me. “Clark, stand up.” She said sweetly.

I obeyed. I clenched my teeth. The waistband was pulled back and she took a look down inside my diaper. I felt her hand pat my backside. This was it! This was it! Okay! Now the front…just two fingers inside the leg cuffs and… “Okay. Sit down.”

I did. My feet felt like they’d been kicked out from beneath me. I looked up at the Yamatoan. She was already doing the same to Ivy, oblivious to my look of shock and betrayal. I was wet! I’d peed myself and now needed changing! I wanted my shorts back! That was the deal! The covenant!

Zoge didn’t notice. Ivy did. “Mommy and Mrs. Beouf don’t change you at snack time unless you reeeally need it,” she said after she sat back down. “Like poopy. Or super super about to leak wet.”

“Come on Chaz,” I heard Mrs. Zoge say loud and clear. “Let’s get you changed.” A chorus of giggles went up from Chaz’s group. Noses were held. Fingers were being pointed. “Annie, you’re next. And try not to bounce in your seat too much.” Annie quieted down. I couldn’t see her face, but I saw her shoulders slump. The others just giggled more.

“Annie’s STINKY!”

What was with this group?! I’d seen fifth graders, practically middle schoolers, who picked on each other less. Kids can be cruel. Littles can be crueler.

I gripped the bottle with both hands, tilted my head back and slugged back more punch. I’d have to debase myself further to merit a change. Might as well get to work on it.

“Hey Clark?” Ivy tapped me on the shoulder. “Do you wanna play on the playground later today?”

I waved her off. “Sure, Ivy. I’ll hang out with you. Keep you company.” As if that’s what I hadn’t been doing for the last two hours.

“Clark?”

Again. I tried to stop from rolling my eyes. “Yeah?”

“Can I give you something?”

I didn’t see the devilish look on her face. I should have recognized it. I should have read her body language. Listened to her tone. I’d seen it before. I should have asked, “what?”. I didn’t though. “Yeah,” I said, not even looking at her. “Sure.”

That’s when Ivy Zoge leaned over and kissed me.