Re: Dante’s Infanzia
Chapter 17: I Am Mine
Everything had come down to this: Dante’s death, the Judy’s, Lysa, Midori, the Newborn Room, Caroline, regressing, Jamal, Vivian, Kevin, his Grandparents, the truth about Lysa, approaching the threshold, finding his anchor, singing, standing, being punished, Saint Jude, things getting even worse, and now this. Dante was about to commit his one last act of defiance against the forces of Heaven and their jailors in Limbo. They would see the mortals in their care as something to be respected, not manipulated; that they were more than just simple children to be rewarded or punished as deemed appropriate.
Some very small part of Dante questioned himself; felt guilty. Maybe the Judy’s were doing the right thing in the long run. Then he remembered that the Devil was once an angel as well. Not even angels were perfect. They only held onto that pretense. These things were just as capable of fault, pride, and monstrousness as any sentient creature. They just had special tools to help them in their designs. Hopefully Dante’s plan would shock them bad enough to where they’d think twice, but he wasn’t doing this for them. Not at all. Fuck them with a giant spoon and twist it sideways.
Dante always thought that guilt was the last thing to go. Apparently not. He had so many other emotions running through him that he couldn’t register them all. Anger, fear, hope, even a little bit of pride. He’d never felt like this.
He counted to a hundred slowly, as the stroller moved along the winding narrow path. Then he counted backwards from a hundred just to be sure. He wanted to be at about the half-way point before he started, too far away from Limbo or Heaven for reinforcements to arrive in time to make a difference. It was fortunate that the Judy in the green dress hadn’t stripped him of his ability to count. Dante smiled. Then again, maybe she did, and he was just taking it back anyways.
Dante knew exactly what song he wanted to use. It wasn’t “You Gotta Keep ‘Em Separated”, but he liked it better in this instance. “You Gotta Keep ‘Em Separated” was a story about punk kids that shirked responsibility and consequences. “You’re under 18 you won’t be doing any time. Come out and play.” That wasn’t who Dante was anymore.
This song, Dante’s new song, was about all the wonderful things that people had inside of them, and how they shouldn’t shut those things away. They’d be incomplete without them. It was about how indomitable the human spirit was and how in the end, everything was going to be okay. That was Dante now. It wasn’t what people wanted him to be, but it was what he chose to become.
Dante started tapping his foot in the stroller, counting to himself to keep the beat. It was in 3/4 time so it was trickier than your average pop song. The strongest part of the beat came on the downbeat at the beginning. Kind of like a waltz. ONE-two-three, ONE-two-three, ONE-two-three. Okay Judy, let’s dance.
Dante began to sing, just barely above a whisper. Weaving his final, greatest spell. He sang:
“the selfish, they are all standing in line,
faithing and hoping to buy themselves time.
me i figure as each breath goes by,
i only own my mind.”
He felt the strength and coordination return to his arms. He could picture the words in his head, with actual letters.
“the north is to south, what the clock is to time.
there’s east and there’s west and there’s everywhere life.
i know i was born and i know that i’ll die,
the in-between is mine.
i. am. mine.”
Lysa looked over at him. She had heard. She started tearing up in realization. She mouthed the words “No”. Dante kept going into the chorus. Louder this time, with pride, so that Judy could hear. He unbuckled himself from the stroller.
“When the meaning gets left behind,
All the innocence lost at one time”
The stroller stopped suddenly. It shook a little as the angel tried to unsuccessfully spank Dante through the back of the stroller. It was too padded and reinforced to make it through. Dante sang on in wait.
“Significant behind the eyes”
Dante looked to his left and waited. With the road being so narrow, it was Judy’s only route.
“There’s no need to hide.”
He reached out and jabbed the Judy in the stomach. The angel wasn’t used to full strength contact and doubled over.
“We’re safe tonight!”
Dante lunged sideways out of the stroller, and like a tiger swiped at his captor’s head. A smile formed on his lips and Eddie Vedder’s guitar riff sounded that much louder when he saw her ear plugs fall out. Dante glanced around. Just like last time, every angel that could hear his voice was still and entranced.
Especially, to his satisfaction, the Judy in the nursery scrubs. Time to bring it home.
“THE OCEAN IS FULL CAUSE EVERYONE’S CRIED”
He stood up on his own two feet.
“THE FULL MOON IS LOOKING FOR FRIENDS AT HIGH TIDE”
He ripped off the blue baby t-shirt.
THE SORRY GROWS BIGGER WHEN THE SORROW’S DENIED
The diaper followed.
“I ONLY KNOW MY MIND”
He strode up to the Judy, the hairs on his body sprouting out of him, stubble coating his face. Dante reared his fist back….
“I! AM! MINE!”
WHAM!
The Judy stumbled back from the force of Dante’s blow and tumbled off the side, down through the celestial sky. Apparently, having never been designed or purposed to leave Heaven or Limbo, these so-called angels lacked wings. Dante nodded his approval and grinned. His turn now.
“What in God’s name is happening to the Judy’s, Molly?!” a familiar voice rang out in the stillness. Dante’s head whipped around. His grandparents were no more than 30 feet from him. What were they doing here? He turned to face them.
“Frank, he’s staring at us…and he’s naked,” Grandma whispered a little too loudly. “Do something.”
“Uh…sorry to interrupt.” Grandpa stammered. “We got permission to walk on down this road and pick up our grandson early so we could spend some more time with him.” Dante saw that Grandma was holding a child’s potty under her arms, and Grandpa had a package of what could only have been Pull-Ups.
“Wait a second, Frank.” Dante’s grandmother said, squinting at Dante. “He looks just like our Bobby did when he was a teen-” then it clicked.
“Dante?!” they both said in unison. The plastic potty chair rattled as it was dropped to the ground.
Dante smiled. It wasn’t a happy smile, but it was for them. An idea occurred to him.
“Hey Grandma, hey Grandpa!” he shouted. “Tell everyone what you saw here, and give my regards to the Big Guy. Pass this along to Him for me, would ya, Grandpa?” Dante raised his middle finger in the air. His grandparents didn’t move. Only nodded.
Dante peered over the side. Nothing but clouds blocking his view, but Dante knew what lay below them. Here goes nothing.
Dante felt a hand grab his wrist. A Judy. It had been too long since he had stopped singing. He spun around and swung his fist at top speed. His fist stopped an inch from connecting with Lysa’s face.
LYSA! She was standing…SHE WAS STANDING! Just like him she was standing, and completely naked.
“Please don’t go.” she said, looking into his eyes.
“How?” Dante asked. “How did you-?”
“As soon as I realized you were singing, I started talking to myself. Lying. I kept telling myself lies again and again, and next thing I know, here I am.”
“What lie did you tell yourself?” Dante questioned.
“That everything was going to be okay.” A single tear danced down her face.
They just stood there. Holding each other between two after-lives. Not a word was spoken. Enough words had been spoken, lies had been told, and songs had been sung to last an eternity. Dante surveyed his battle field.