When I walked through the doors of the school I was greeted by two bubbly girls, one a short-cut blonde, the other a curly haired brunet. I’d never seen them at school before, but that isn’t saying much; when you come right down to it, I’ve already missed more days of school then I’ve actually attended. The blonde took my coat, hat and gloves while the brunet gave me a piece of paper with a number on it.

“What’s this for?” I asked the brunet.

In typical teenage girl snobbery she answered with, “Uh, HELLO? So you can get your coat back when you leave.”

“Oh,” I said stuffing the paper into my pants pocket.

I was somewhat concerned that I had come overdressed. Mom had insisted that I wear a tie and you can’t wear a tie without wearing a nice crisply ironed shirt and slacks. And my shoes were so shiny I could almost see myself in them. However, those fears were put to rest when I saw that there were guys that had come more dressed up then I was, with suits and even a couple guys wearing tuxedos. There were also many guys, and I guess girls too, that were just wearing their regular street clothes. And get this, there was even some numbskull running around in Bermuda’s, a flowery Hawaiian shirt, and flip-flops. Back in Chula Vista that is how most guys dress all the time — well, maybe not that psychogenic flower shirt, but in this frozen hell? I don’t think you’ll ever see me in a pair of shorts again!

With all that said, what I was really on the lookout for was some guy dressed in a bright blue button up shirt with a red collar and wearing blue Converse shoes with no laces in them.

Right then some girl grabbed my arm. “Oh my gawd! You’re the guy aren’t you?” she said in nearly perfect California beach bunny fashion.

She had long brown hair and brown eyes partially hidden behind small frameless glasses. She was flanked on either side by two other girls, one a redhead with a nose that seemed to be made more of freckles than skin and the other had very short brown hair with overly long bangs; I dare say if she hadn’t been wearing a dress and makeup, I might have mistaken her for a dude.

“Well are you or aren’t you?” the redhead asked.

“I’m sorry?” I asked, not having a clue what they were talking about.

“Aren’t you the guy that slapped the teacher?” The short haired girl asked.

“Uh, I didn’t slap anyone.” I said which was the truth. I guess somewhere along the grapevine, the event that I believed them to be referring to had become slightly different than the actual facts.

“You see Becky! I told you he wasn’t the guy.” The long haired girl said to the redhead.

But before they could get away I decided to spice up the gossip myself and see how insanely wild it would get by first period on Monday morning.

“Oh, I’m the guy alright! But I didn’t slap that teacher. I gave her a little bit of the same thing I gave that other kid!”

“That was you too?!” the red-head asked in this high-pitched, fear filled tone that could have shattered glass, rendered an entire herd of cattle sterile and caused the Great Wall of China to crumble.

The lot of them looked both horrified and awestruck at the same time. With a giddy, girlish, three part harmony-squeal the three of them quickly vanished into the crowd leaving me standing there looking and feeling quite proud of myself.

The hallway leading from the front school doors to the gymnasium was packed with students standing around talking, laughing and enjoying themselves. It was when I finally stepped into the gym that I was really blown away. The school gymnasium had been converted into a fairytale winter wonderland. Except for the wooden floor, I hardly recognized the place and boy was the music loud. I looked across the gym and saw that there was a band playing, but I couldn’t see them well from where I was standing.

I wandered around a while until I found myself standing near the back of the room about as far away from the band as I could possibly be. It was there that I got a serious shock. As I was leaning against the cool cinderblock wall I realized that directly to my left, sitting on a metal folding chair was this guy who looked to be too old to be at our Junior High School dance. He looked like he was at least a Freshmen in High School but more likely a Sophomore. Maybe he’d been held back a couple grades… or more. He was sitting there, reclining a bit and had a suit jacket draped over his lap.

What had caught my attention was the fact that the jacket was moving… a lot! It took me less than a millisecond to realize just what was going on under that jacket. I’d seen enough of that sort of stuff on the beaches of Chula-Vista to know when a dude is getting a blowjob.

Standing directly in front of him with their backs to him were three girls who also looked too old to be at this dance. Then again about 80% of the girls at the dance were wearing dresses and makeup that made them look 10 years older than they really are. It was obvious from my vantage point that the girls were acting as a wall to block other party-goers from the performance beneath the jacket.

Don’t ask me why I stayed at that spot, coyly watching out of the corner of my eye; I simply do not know. However all of that wasn’t the shocking part at all. What shocked the hell out of me was when the dude pulled his jacket away from his lap just enough that I was able to see that he was getting a blow job from this boy who looked younger than me by a year or two.

I glanced up at the guy and he was looking right at me, smiling closed mouth, while that little guy had his face buried in what had to be one of the largest patches of pubic hair I have seen in my life. I cannot tell you the size of the dude’s wang simply because it was buried in that little guy’s throat!

He blew me a kiss and winked at me.

“Dude! That is just wrong!” I snarled and using my shoulder like a battering ram I shoved those three girls out of the way as I shouted at the top of my lungs, “HEY LOOK HERE!” and ducked away before anyone saw me.

I don’t know for sure what happened after that, however, I heard a rumor the following week that the dude getting blown ended up being arrested. I’ve no idea who the little dude was and never heard anything about him at all.