In all of the commotion of the end of the school day, I had totally forgotten about the fact that I had wet that dang diaper. When Mom came home from work she found me in my room, sitting on the floor doing my homework. Okay, that’s not true; I had been doing my homework right up to the point where I fell asleep on the floor. Mom had come in and checked my diaper before waking me up. When I awoke I was laying on my back looking up at the ceiling. She already had removed my pants and was removing the tapes from my wet diaper.
“Sorry sweetie, I was trying not to wake you.” She apologized.
“Why do you keep folding up the edges of your bedding like that?” she asked and as I rubbed the sleep from my eyes I answered her, “So I can see if anything is trying to hide under my bed.” and then I realized what she was doing.
“No, but Mom!” I started to say as I reached for the front of my diaper.
But Mom, thinking I was objecting to being changed snapped at me, “Alvin, I’m not going to let you stay in a wet diaper!”
“No, not that!” I quickly said, “I was going to say that I was dry, I mean at school today. Like I said I would. I stayed dry!”
“That’s not what your Grandfather told me.” She said and I was confused. I thought Grandfather said we were going to keep everything between the two of us. I guess he didn’t mean the part about me wetting myself at school.
“Well, yeah, I mean no. I mean I only did at the end. I mean wet myself, at the end of the day and it wasn’t my fault!” I said not sure if what I was saying made much sense at all.
“Alvin sweetheart, there is absolutely no shame at all in wearing diapers to protect your pants from getting wet. Think about how you would have felt if you hadn’t been wearing this when you wet today?” she said as she pulled the wet diaper out from under me and slid a dry one back in its place.
“But Mom!” I started to complain, but I knew it was useless.
“Now, don’t you think we should get you dressed for your party?” Mom said as she pulled the new diaper up into place.
“It’s not a party; it’s just a stupid school dance.” I said still feeling rather miffed.
She started to pull the diaper into place when I said, “But I want to take a shower first.”
Mom paused, looked at me and then grimaced, which I took to mean that she thought it was a good idea too.
“Alright, but you better hurry it up and I’ll be right back to help you get ready.” She said.
I groaned to myself as I stood up because my body was still a bit sore in places. Half naked I streaked across the room, headed for the bathroom.
Before I was even in the bathroom I had my shirt pulled off and was hopping on one foot while tugging at my sock.
“And be sure to wash your diaper area extra well.” Mom said loudly.
In the bathroom I first turned on the shower before I went over and tossed my shirt and sock down the laundry chute. I had to lean my butt against the vanity so that I could pull off my other sock.
“Oh that’s cold!” I exclaimed as the cold marble of the vanity counter touched the small of my back.
I spun around and slammed the second sock into the chute. That is when the mirror image of me caught my eye and we locked gazes.
“Hi there gruesome!” I said to my reflection as we both straightened up together.
I waved and noticed that the mirror me, who was waving back, looked different then I remembered him and I am not talking about the battle scars from the fight in the park; I mean he looked different. Even though I had seen myself as recently as that very morning while combing my hair, I hadn’t noticed that my hair seemed oddly darker now. I know you are wondering how does black hair get darker? Well it appeared to have done just that. And was my skin lighter too? Then again, maybe it was all just my imagination. It really hadn’t been that long since I was hanging out on the sunny coastal beaches of California.
“I wonder how long it takes for a tan to fade.” I said to my reflection.
I shrugged my shoulders and so did the other me.
“You don’t know either huh?” I said and then we both took a step away from the mirror.
We both struck the same pose by flexing our arms and tightening our bellies.
“I hope you don’t mind me saying so, but Alvin,” I paused to wink at myself, “despite your war wounds, you’re looking hot.”
Now, I don’t have the biggest and best body in the world. I’m not built for power or speed; I’m built for two things and those are swimming and surfing. Looking at myself in the mirror, I still looked good, but perhaps not as trim and cut as I was a few weeks before. Maybe because in Maine there isn’t anything to do, but sleep, eat, and sit around watching the snow get deeper and deeper as it slowly engulfs the world… me included!
I pointed at myself in the mirror and said, “You need to get your sexy butt back into the ocean before you end up looking like one of those fat pasty-skinned weekend summer tourist!
I continued to check myself out for a minute or two; even leaning in to get a really good look at my stitches and tickling the threads with my fingernail. Then I saw the steam beginning to billow out of the shower behind me and knew that it was ready for me.
“HOT! HOT! HOT!” I shouted as the water sprayed the top of my foot.
After leaping back out and dancing around a bit, I reached in and readjusted the temperature. “Dang-it, I thought this thing wasn’t supposed to let it burn me!?” I looked back at myself in the mirror, “You didn’t see that, did you?”
Thankfully my reflection indicated that he hadn’t by shaking his head.
Much more timidly, I reached in and felt the water to make sure I wasn’t going to scald myself again. It was still especially warm, but it wasn’t so hot that I’d cook myself.
I guess I was in the shower too long because before I knew it I heard Mom calling, “Alvin you need to hurry up in there!”
“Almost done Mother of mine!” I lied; I hadn’t even soaped up yet. I was too busy enjoying the warm water as it cascaded down over my body. Boy it sure felt good!
However, once Mom had hollered I started speeding up. I quickly washed my hair and all the rest of me. I even remembered to wash my diaper area twice, front and back. After making three complete turns under the water I shut it off and jumped out. Surprise, there was Mom standing in the doorway holding the diapering supplies. She set them down on the counter, picked up a towel and began drying me. When she was satisfied that I was dry she spread the towel on the floor and instructed me to lie down.
“Right here?” I squalled.
“Yes right here!” she said.
“Mom, do I have to wear that?” I whined, “Can’t I have a GoodNite instead? Just this once?”
That started yet another argument where I was against this whole diaper idea and Mom was totally for it. And before I knew it I was on my back and she was positioning the last tape.
That is when she said in a very cold and harsh tone which sounded very much the way Grandmother sounds when she is worked up, “And I don’t want to hear anything else about you not wearing these. I’m tired of arguing with you about them. As long as you are having accidents and wetting your bed you are going to wear them! Do I make myself clear?”
When I didn’t respond she did something that I couldn’t believe she would do. She smacked me right on my bare thigh as she said, “Young man!” she hit me again, “I asked you a question.”
Instinctively I rubbed my burning thigh as anger mingled with tears in my eyes. Through clenched teeth I answered her back with a short-forceful, “Yes!”
In that one word, I had tried to pack all of my anger and frustrations, but it seemed to bounce off her as though she were protected by an invisible mom-shield.
Mom then combed my hair for me before leading me out of the bathroom so that she could help me get dressed. All the while not a single word was spoken between the two of us. When Grandfather and I left to go back to the school I didn’t say anything in return when Mom had said to me, “Have a good time at the dance. I love you.”
I did however make it a point to say, “Bye Grandmother, Bye John. See you in a couple hours.”
“You upset with your mother again?” Grandfather asked as he was backing out of the garage.
Still fuming I asked him, “I thought you said we were going to keep what happened today between us?”
“Yes, I did and I meant it.” Grandfather said sounding confused.
I guess I should have been surprised that he hadn’t lost his temper with me. I mean I was being more than a bit rude to him.
I was so angry; I thought that any second I was going to suddenly burst into flames. “Then why did you tell Mom that I had an accident at school today?”
Grandfather didn’t respond right away. He simply drove the car and watched the road. He was quiet for so long that I started to think he wasn’t going to answer me.
“I am sorry, boy.” He finally said, “I didn’t know that you didn’t want me to say anything about that.”
“Well now she says I have to wear,” I had become an erupting volcano and God help my Grandfather, he didn’t lose his cool when I said, “these damn diapers all the time.”
I was squeezing both fists, even the one wrapped with the Ace bandage as tight as I could while saying, “And to make things even worse; I think at least one of my friends…” as I ranted I was also questioning myself as to when I had started considering Larry and the others friends, “knows about them and who knows how many others at school know after that whole locker note thing. And if my other friends don’t know yet, I am sure they will soon enough.”
I was so worked up that I angrily elbowed the car door with the same arm that was connected to my sore wrist.
“Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit!” I cussed and groaned as the pain momentarily blotted out all other emotions and thoughts.
I cradled my now throbbing wrist to my chest and rocked back and forth as if that would make the pain go away.
“Feel better?” Grandfather asked with just the smallest hint of agitation in his voice.
“No!” I moaned and rocked.
“Then would you mind not tearing up my new car?” he said, but it was the way he said it. It was almost like he was trying to cheer me up. But I didn’t want to be cheered up; I wanted to be upset; I wanted to be angry! I wanted to make someone or something feel as bad as I did. And why wasn’t he mad? Why wasn’t he yelling at me for cussing?
For a few seconds I thought I was going to start crying, but somehow I was able to choke back the tears as I said, “I just wish we could go back to Chula Vista and have things be like they were before.” And though I wasn’t crying, my voice sure sounded like I was.
Grandfather caught me off guard when he asked, “What note?”
“Huh?” I grunted.
“You said something about a locker note.” Grandfather said.
Thankfully I didn’t have to try and explain that because we had arrived at the school. As we pulled into the school parking lot Grandfather reached over and took hold of my thigh like he had done earlier in the garage. “Well I for one am glad you’re here with us in Maine. And would you do me one favor?”
I swallowed against the lump in my throat as I tried to say, “What?”
“For the next couple of hours, I want you to forget about everything. Forget about your mom, forget about being mad and just have a good time with your friends. If you have to, imagine that everything in your life is exactly as you want it to be and have fun.” He squeezed my leg again, “Can you do that for me?”
I swallowed again and forced myself to smile while my head bobbed like a buoy in the ocean, “Yeah, I think I can do that.”
“Atta-boy.” He said, “Now get out of my car. I’m missing Wheel of Fortune! What-What!”