New Year’s Eve meant more to me than the end of one year and the birth of another. It brought me another close encounter with the diapered kind. Okay, it was only my friends Mark and Sean, but that still counts.
Mark and Sean were sleeping over and the three of us had decided to stay up to watch the famous New Year’s Eve Ball descend from the flagpole atop Times Square in New York City.
My brother, who was still recouping from his surgery, was spending most of his time in his bed. My sister had gone to stay at a friend’s and my parents had gone to bed shortly after nine that night. So, the three of us had free run of the house and control of the television.
We still had a couple hours before the ball would drop, so, to keep ourselves awake, we ate popcorn, and drank several sodas while we played a card game called Uno.
Sean was the first to lose his pajamas by proclaiming, “It’s too hot!” and sat there playing Uno wearing only his GoodNite. Mark, quickly followed suit and stripped down to reveal that he was wearing one of his Tena® diapers. I’m not sure if Mark was aware of the fact or not, but it was plain to see by Sean and I that he had already wet. Not wanting to be the only one wearing pajamas, I stripped down to my white Fruit-of-the-Loom’s and socks. I mean it is winter you know!
We had the TV on while we played Uno and every so often, it would switch to the local New Year’s Eve celebrations. What caught my attention was when an announcer said, “And as the clock strikes midnight, Old Father Time will pass the torch to Baby New Year.” I looked up at the TV and standing to the left of the announcer was an old man wearing a white toga and sporting a long white beard. To the right of the announcer was a boy of nine or ten at the most. He wasn’t wearing any clothes, just a big cloth diaper and a white sash that said, “Baby New Year” in gold letters.
“Max. Look, quick!” Mark said.
“I’m looking! I’m looking!” I exclaimed.
“I sure wouldn’t want to be him!” Sean commented.
“Wait a second!” Mark said excitedly, and then crawled closer to the television.
“Mark, get out of the way!” Sean said to me.
He turned, and with an expression of extreme exasperation, he said, “I know that Baby New Year!”
“No you don’t!” I said, “That’s on TV in New York!”
“No it isn’t, that is here!” Sean explained.
“What?” I said to Sean and then asked Mark, “Well who is he?”
But then, the camera did a close up on the new Baby New Year and I rushed to the television, scattering our cards everywhere. “Holy buckets! I know him too!”
“What?” Sean said, sounding as though he didn’t like being left out.
Mark and I were on all fours in front of the TV so Sean couldn’t see, but that didn’t stop him. With a spine snapping leap, Sean jumped onto my back and rested his chin on my right shoulder.
“I… I don’t know his name,” I said getting even closer to the screen.
“I thought you said you knew him?” Sean asked in an accusatorial tone.
I turned my head enough that I could see Sean and said, “I do, but I don’t think I ever got to find out his name.”
The camera man switched to the old man with the beard.
“No, go back to the Baby New Year!” I shouted at the television but it was too late. The camera went to the announcer who said, “Now let’s take you back to the Time Square celebration!”
“Aaarrg! Bring back the Baby you stupid box!” I said to the TV.
“So who was that?” Sean asked Mark.
Mark scooted away from the TV as he said, “He’s in my Judo class.”
“Since when do you take Judo?” I asked, feeling more than a little annoyed.
Mark smiled, “Since yesterday. It was one of my Christmas presents.”
“You didn’t tell me!” I said even more annoyed.
“Yes I did. I said my mom got me self-defense classes.” Mark said, scooping at the cards.
“Oh yeah, you did tell me that.” I relented.
With Sean still on my back, I gave him a horsy-ride backwards before bucking him off. He hit the floor, knees first and laughing.
“Hey, that was fun!” he giggled and then got this really serious look on his face. “Okay, if one of you doesn’t tell me who that Baby was, so help me, I’m going to, to, to… I don’t know what I’m going to do!” Sean warned us and then pointed at me with his pinky-finger, “But you won’t like it!” He then laughed again, but I could tell he was as impatient as I was to find out the boy’s name.
“I met him in the hospital when I had that nasty rash from pulling all those weeds.” I then explained. “He had a broken leg and broken bones, here,” I pointed to my shoulders.
“Collar bone?” Sean offered.
“Yeah, that’s it.” I agreed while giving Sean a playful backhand to the arm.
“You know, he was wearing a diaper even then.” I said.
“I’ll have to find out his name next time I have Judo.” Mark said.
“You better!” I warned him.
We never did get back to playing cards. Mark needed to get changed, so he went to my room while Sean and I sat watching the television with much interest and anticipation. About twenty minutes before midnight, they switched back to the local celebration for about five minutes, but neither the old man, nor Baby New Year returned. When they switched back to Time Square again, Sean told Mark and I to let him know if it came back on. Though he didn’t actually say he was going to go change, we both figured that was where he was going because, when he stood up, his GoodNite was hanging down, making it obvious that he’d really wet it at least once and probably several times.
Sean was gone a good while and when he returned, Mark and I knew why he’d taken so long. He walked back into the family room wearing one of Marks diapers, which was really too big for him but still fit and did the job for which it was intended. I looked to Mark to see if he minded and saw that he was smiling his approval. However, he wasn’t smiling at Sean. He was smiling at me, because he knew I was in heaven right then.
“I didn’t think you would mind if I tried one.” Sean said sheepishly.
“You look smashing!” I said while patting his diapered bottom.
