I opened my laptop somewhat nervously and typed “ABDL” into the search bar. I hit enter and immediately was faced with millions of search results about adult babies and diapers which I just couldn’t seem to get my mind off of. Despite my intense interest, I still had done nothing more than prowl through websites, youtube videos, subreddits, and forums. I had not worn a diaper since my bedwetting days and I do not think my parents ever had me use a pacifier. Why was I so entranced with all of this? I guess I’ll never know.
Regardless of all of that, today I was going to take the leap from the internet to real life and by leap I mean a baby step (no pun intended). I didn’t want to go all in from the get go because I thought there still might be a chance I didn’t like it in real life. I decided I would limit myself to $100 dollars worth of stuff. I know that may sound like a lot but let’s be honest ABDL stuff can get much more expensive fast. Also I had just gotten a large bonus from my job after a record breaking quarter so I figured a little splurge was okay.
Originally I had just planned to go to the drug store and buy a pack of adult diapers. However, months of internet research has shown me that these diapers suck. I wanted my first experience to be great and not filled with leaks from cheap diapers.
One of the first websites that my search yielded was ABUniverse. From my limited experience, these diapers seemed to be pretty good and all of their designs were super duper cute. I looked through the site debating over which pack of diapers I would get. The decision seemed to be absolutely impossible. There were almost 20 different diapers to choose from! I switched over to a new tab and searched “Cloth backed or plastic backed diapers?” The basic answer that I found was, cloth backed diapers are more breathable and quiet while plastic ones are less breathable and noisy. I reasoned that since it was early June and pretty warm I would go with Cloth backed although I would be giving up the crinkling. Okay so that eliminated about half of the options but I still had many to choose from. After debating over it for a few minutes, I thought to myself that the pattern really didn’t matter too much and I really wanted the most absorbent diaper. That left me between the AlphaGatorZ and Little Kings. After looking a little closer at them I thought the Little Kings were absolutely adorable. Even more so than the cuteness of the AlphaGatorZ. I selected size medium and clicked add to cart. I then went back to the home page to see what else the site had. I looked briefly at their onesies but after seeing the price I decided to shop elsewhere.
I opened up amazon and searched for “ABDL onesies.” Once again many results came up instantly and I prepared once again for the decision ahead of me. I scrolled down quickly taking a glance at all the onesies until I saw a space themed onesie from littletude. The onesie was covered with cute smiling planets and almost instantly I knew this one would be the one for me. When I was little I always was obsessed with space so I figured that this would be a great option for me. I looked through the sizes and decided to get a medium. I hoped that it would be long enough because I am decently tall but I decided it would be best not to worry about it. I added the onesie to the cart and clicked home.
My amazon home page was now filled with all sorts of ABDL products. One thing that caught my attention was a pack of adult pacifiers. I don’t know why but I had a feeling that this would be something I would love. There was a blue, red, and orange pacifier and after seeing it was on sale for $12. I put it in my cart as well. After adding up the cost of the diapers, onesie, and pacifiers. I still had a little bit left in my budget. I remembered having to give up a lot of crinkling by choosing cloth backed diapers so I thought maybe buying a pair of plastic pants would be good. I could have the crinkling and if I got too hot I could always take them off. I found a three pack of clear ones so they wouldn’t conceal the cute designs of the diapers I bought. Once I added those to the cart, I clicked place order and now had to patiently wait for my order to come in.

I got up to get ready for work on Wednesday, two days after I placed my Amazon order, when I saw a notification on my phone that my package was out for delivery. I was giddy with excitement as I made breakfast and threw on my work clothes. All I could think about as I headed out the door was what I was going to do when I got home. Unfortunately for me, when I got home I was still hours away so I had to put my thoughts away for now.
Work was almost painful as I had to suppress my excitement so my work performance wouldn’t go down. The hours seemed to drag on even more than they normally would. After what seemed like a lifetime of working and waiting, 5:00 finally came. I practically ran to my car eager to get home. My phone buzzed and a notification read that my order was only 3 stops away from my house. I turned on my car and drove home being extra careful to not speed from excitement. I pulled into the driveway of my house and looked at my porch seeing nothing there. I sighed realizing it hadn’t been delivered yet. I walked up to my door, unlocked it and started to go inside when I heard a van pull into my driveway. It was the Amazon delivery van! I waited in the doorway while the driver walked up to my door. He handed me the package and I smiled and thanked him before going inside.
I shut and locked the door before going to my living room to tear into the box. I used my keys to tear through the tape and open the box revealing my three items. I was so happy and I couldn’t stop smiling after looking at what I had finally bought. I first took out the plastic pants and set them aside as they were the most boring item I had bought. I then took out the onesie and took a second to stare at it. The design was much more detailed than the amazon pictured had let on. I absolutely loved it! Finally I took out the pacifiers. I figured this would be the first item I would “try.” Unfortunately, the packaging for them was absolutely impossible to open. I struggled for nearly 10 minutes with a pair of scissors trying to free the pacifiers from the box they came in. I was doing this while trying not to accidentally cut myself or possibly damage the pacifiers. Once I broke open the box once and for all. I picked up the blue pacifier. It was baby blue with a large shield with two holes on either side of the button in the middle. I had heard about decorating pacifiers so I figured I would be doing this eventually too. I took off the cover and studied the shape of the silicon nipple. It was clear and much bigger than I had originally expected. A little hesitantly I placed the pacifier in my mouth and began to suck on it. Almost immediately, I was greeted with the taste of plastic. It put me off a little bit and I took it out of my mouth. I was a little bit disappointed that it tasted so bad and I figured there must be a way to fix it. I pulled out my phone to look it up then I got an idea. I brought the paci to my bathroom and squirted a glob of toothpaste on it. I wasn’t sure if this was a good idea or not but I figured it wouldn’t hurt. I brushed the paci thoroughly with my toothbrush before rinsing it off with some warm water. Then I popped it back into my mouth and I was relieved that it now tasted like mint and not like plastic. Now with the distraction of taste gone I could now fully appreciate the sensation. The pacifier almost completely filled my mouth up and I was a little surprised by how much I enjoyed it.
While keeping the pacifier in my mouth I walked back to my living room to retrieve the rest of my package. At this point I realized that I still had my work clothes on. I grabbed the onesie and plastic pants before breaking down the amazon box. I put it in my trash can and then walked to my bedroom bringing along the other two things. I stopped briefly in the bathroom to look in the mirror. I thought I looked a bit ridiculous since I was wearing professional clothes while sucking on a pacifier. Once I got to my room, I took off my work clothes and then decided to take off my underwear too. I was now curious about the plastic pants so I opened up the package which was much easier than the pacifiers. I took out a pair and stepped into the two leg holes. Even just doing that I could already hear the crinkle that they made. I pulled them up with the top part being over my hip and nearing my belly button. I was glad that they fit really well and both the legs and waist felt very secure but not too tight. It was a very strange feeling to have plastic against my bare skin. The pants were cool against the warmness of my thighs and crotch. I figured that they would feel more natural with a diaper underneath them. At that I decided to check my ABU order while still wearing only the plastic pants. I saw that my diapers would not be coming until Friday. I was pretty disappointed to see that but at least I would have all weekend to try them out. Instead of pouting about it I just moved on to my final item, the onesie. I tore off the plastic it came in and picked up the onesie. It felt super soft and I held it up to my skin to feel how soft it truly was. I decided to keep the bare plastic pants on for now and I pulled the onesie over my head. It felt even more soft on my body much more than any t-shirt I ever had. On top of the softness the one side fit perfectly and was not too short. I then started to snap together the four snaps at the crotch. The plastic pants started to morph around where the onesie crotch was which didn’t feel comfortable. I unsnapped the onesie and pulled the plastic pants off. They would be useful once the diapers came but for now not so much. I snapped the onesie closed again and the softness against my crotch felt amazing.
I stepped back into my bathroom to once again look in the mirror. I nearly lost the pacifier out of my mouth when it dropped open. I couldn’t believe how freaking cute I looked. This was exactly what I had wanted and I almost couldn’t believe it was happening. I stood there in the bathroom for a minute just staring at myself in the mirror. I was in a trance just looking myself up and down.
After I was done admiring how adorable I looked I went back to my living room to watch some TV. I made sure that the shades were closed so no one would see me wearing only a onesie and sucking on a pacifier. I decided that I wanted to watch something to make me feel little so I turned on Nick Jr. While I watched I couldn’t stop smiling about how everything was turning out. I was living a dream that I had for so long. After about an hour of watching TV I had to go to the bathroom. I sighed as I couldn’t just go in a diaper like I wished I could. I got up and headed to the bathroom, unsnapped the onesie and went. While I was peeing I thought that I can’t wait till Friday to wear a diaper but I started to come up with a plan. For now though, I went to my kitchen to make dinner.
While I was eating I was searching on my phone about diapers I could buy at the store. I read a little about size 7 pampers but mostly everyone said they wouldn’t fit at all which made sense as they were made for babies. Pull Ups had the same problem despite them being made for toddlers and not babies. I then looked into drug store diapers and reasoned whether or not to try them. I knew from my previous research that they were not good quality leaked for almost everyone. I did have the plastic pants though and those hopefully would keep in some of the leaks. I then stumbled upon Goodnites which were designed for older children and teenagers. I saw the sizes went up to 140 pounds. Despite my height I was only 145 so I decided that tomorrow I would go get some for myself. After eating dinner, I turned on the Lorax and watched until I was almost falling asleep. By the time the movie had ended I decided to just call it a night. I decided to leave my pacifier in for the night and I figured that it would help me sleep better. Unfortunately, the pacifier was somewhat distracting and I couldn’t fall asleep. After about a half hour I gave up with the pacifier and set it on my bed-side table. I then quickly drifted off into sleep.