A big brown snake hanging out of my butt; just dangling there and not knowing what to do, I clamped my cheeks together. Big mistake! I felt the poop break away, but before it did I felt it smear inside my crack.
“Thank goodness Mom gave me plenty of napkins.” I said aloud.
“Alvin, are you ok?” I heard Mom ask and she sounded close… too close!
“Mom, don’t come down here!” I shouted out of the ravine when I realized that she must have followed me.
“Are you almost done?” she asked.
“Almost!” I shouted back.
“Do you need any help?” she asked.
“Moooooom!” I whimpered, “Can a guy have a little privacy please?”
I waited a moment to be sure she had gone back to the car before I reached back with one of the napkins and wiped myself.