There are few things more boring in the world than standing in line by yourself at Disney. Everyone is with someone else, and talking to them would be forcing a third wheel in the mix, and no one likes a third wheel.

Anywho, back to standing in line.

I had been standing in line for the haunted house for about 15 minutes now swearing that if I rounded another corner filled with people standing around like zombies, I was going to leave and try again when the park got less crowded. Shuffling into a circular room, I heard someone counting us off and guessed that I was only one short hop from getting on the ride.

“Welcome to the MAGICAL land of Disney everyone!!!” Shouted the attendant, an amazingly bubbly girl who seemed ripped right out of a training video, she proceeded to list the safety instructions for this ride. As she ratted out the instructions, the room gave a click and we began moving down as if we were on a slow elevator. A few kids shouted out in fear for a moment, and soft hushes from mothers comforted them. I looked at the ceiling, which was staying in one spot as the floors descended. The walls expanded to keep the illusion going, and I had to say I was impressed. It really looked like I was shrinking.

And then people’s heads came into my field of view, then their necks, and then upper body. Confused I looked down around me.

It was my turn to scream, loudly.

“Oh uh, looks like some little one is getting scared!” Said the bubbly lady. I was however very scared, I was actually shrinking! My head was at the waist of most of the adults in the room, a mother turned to me and smiled warmly as I began to hyperventilate. With a soft click, the room stopped moving and people bumped into me several times as I stood rooted to the ground. Apparently no had noticed the formally 6 foot
(*cough*handsome*cough*) man had shrunken to a mare 3 foot toddler.

A few moments after everyone shuffled out of the room, the bubbly attendant girl noticed me.

“Hey there little guy, aren’t you going to go with your mommy to go on the haunted house?” She asked, again with more enthusiasm than I thought possible for such a boring job.

“Wha…ummm…” Was all I could manage to reply. The sensation of my internal organs folding around to a new shape was very unique, as if someone was unpacking and repacking me over and over. I felt a warm trickle go down my leg and looked down to see a puddle pooling around my shoes. The sensation of urine pooling in my shoes was also not a welcome.

“Oh noes! Are you okay? Where is your mother?” The girl asked again, now in a slightly more serious tone, but nice enough not to scare a toddler.

“My mommy is in Washington” I answered. Which was true, I was a college student who lived in a dorm, she lived in Washington.

“Washington? Then how did you get here silly?” The girl asked.

“I came in…myself…” I began before closing my mouth. I decided to just play quiet for now until I could find a way to get back to my normal size.

The girl sighed gently and grabbed a radio at her waist.