Megan’s cheeks flared up. “I am NOT…” she began and abruptly stopped. She remembered her revenge upon Deanna and how much she had enjoyed it before her conscience set in. Maybe Ted was right. Maybe there IS something like that in all of us.
“Anyway, Meg,” he said, clearing his throat. “I said Ron went back to normal, but a part of him really didn’t. His signals are all mixed up. He still gets dates, but he doesn’t have a clue about girls anymore. That’s why I thought it’d be a good idea for you guys to meet. I wanted to say to him, “Ron, buddy, here’s a nice, normal, healthy girl……the two of you can become friends.”
Megan erupted into laughter. Perhaps it was the fact that she wore a thick diaper under her shorts or perhaps it was the radical curves she’d been thrown this summer, but she wasn’t so sure that ‘nice, normal, healthy girl’ even applied to her anymore.
“It’s not funny,” Ted said sternly.
She nodded and pressed her lips together. It really wasn’t funny and she didn’t have a clue. She had taken a women’s studies class and read all about the destructive phenomenon that was rape. However, all of her knowledge came from the female perspective. She hadn’t a clue what incredible havoc it could wreak upon men.
“I don’t think you should see him again,” Ted told her quietly. “As a friend, maybe, but not like that. He’ll understand. He’s my friend too, remember, and I don’t like to judge people, but eventually he’s going to have to get help with this.”
“And I’d like to help him,” Megan replied. “But I’m scared, Ted. I don’t want to get myself in a situation that I can’t get out of.”
“Then don’t even try,” he advised.
“Well, I think I should at least let him know that I heard about what happened and that I understand.”
He shrugged and threw his hands up in the air in defeat. “Suit yourself.”
“There’s something else, Ted.”
“Yes?”
She thought of telling him of her diapers, of her needs and wants and well-guarded secret “other” life. She thought of telling him of her struggles and problems and yearnings. She came so close……and pulled away.
“Everything good I touch turns bad,” she said in parting. “And then I have to work so hard to make it good again.”
Megan lay on her stomach on the floor of her room, a sheet of white construction paper in front of her, an open box of crayons by her side. Coloring wasn’t the most stimulating activity in the world, but it pleased her. After the chaotic discoveries of the day, she longed for something simple and inoffensive. Crayons would not bite her. The worst they could do was break in her hands.
Carrie came charging into her room and Megan briefly considered telling her to leave. For once, she felt no immediate desire to help her sister out of whatever jam she was in. She had her own dilemma to deal with. Besides, she had done enough. Fortunately for her, Carrie brought good tidings.
“Hey Meg,” she greeted. “Whatcha doing?”
“Colowing,” Megan replied. “You wanna?”
Carrie giggled and shook her head. “Guess what,” she said.
Megan looked up.
“Mom’s gonna let me see Chris again. It’ll be at the movies and during daytime and we can’t sneak off anywhere, but I’m so happy. I haven’t seen him since he was grounded and there’s so much we have to talk about. Well…that I wanna talk about.”
Megan clapped.
“You’re quiet today,” Carrie noted. “By the way, Mom wants to know why you haven’t seen her about a diaper change?”
Megan shrugged.
“Well…do you need one?”