Sally intuitively knew it would be irresponsible (or even abusive) of her to try to rely on her girls for emotional support during her separation with Ted. But beyond that, she also knew that the three of them could handle only so much of the truth of what was actually happening between their parents. They simply were not yet equipped to deal with that kind of adult stress.
Jordan in particular, it seemed, was coping by eating up as much nurture as Sally could give her. Particularly around bedtime, her behavior was beginning to have a bit of a toddler edge to it; almost regressing into a state of helplessness as Sally tenderly diapered her each night. The thirty five year old mother of three didn’t mind it – she just found it difficult to make sense of the overall shift itself in the context of their household The eldest girl could seemingly swing from taking directions about watching her sisters or checking on the laundry to being almost helpless in a matter of just seconds. It was perplexing.
She seems to be in a very fragile state right now – and I don’t want to open up so much as to hurt her. Sally had thought one Friday morning as she crawled out of bed.
Her thoughts continued to bubble around the separation as she ambled across the chilled living room and down the dark hallway. She and Ted had planned for Jordan and her sisters to spend the weekend at his apartment downtown. He would pick them up later that night. Even though it was only a one-bedroom space, he had assured her that he had room for the girls – who would be sharing his bedroom while he would be out on the couch in the living room. As she went into the Jordan’s room to get her up for school before the baby, she was greeted by the musty smell of old urine. It had been almost impossible to get rid of the odor once the two bedwetters had joined forces in once space. Even in diapers, it seemed that the smell just lingered.
“Good morning Jordie,” she said sweetly.
With hopeful anticipation of a dry diaper, Sally gently pulled away Jordan’s comforter to be greeted by Jordan in only a t-shirt and very wet purple diaper whose two blue stripes of “m’s” on the front were obliterated, giving away its contents. For the past few weeks, Sally had found Jordan dressed like this in the morning despite being put to bed wearing pajama bottoms or sleep shorts. She found it slightly odd although she never was aware of her daughter’s sleep habits per se before the bed wetting had begun; so she figured that maybe kicking off her bottoms was a normal nightly ritual for the girl.
“Time to get up sweeties.” She announced a little more firmly.
As Sally checked the middle daughter Mindi, she found her pull-up dry as a bone. Hmmm…the third night in a row. Good Job girl!
“We need to get working on packing for the weekend before you go this morning – remember your dad is gonna pick you up from school today Jordan?”
Jordan mumbled incoherently and then rolled over, exposing the completely drenched backside of her diaper and two wet streaks of pee on her bed – one from either side of her rear end. For the most part, these new fancy diapers had done the trick and it was only on mornings where Jordan slept in that she had slight leakage problems. But with the plastic sheet still on the bed, laundry was much less of an issue.
Not seeing much more in the way of responses from either girl, Sally began the fake drill sergeant routine. “Up – now! Get packing! Clothes. Diapers. Jacket. Shoes. Church Clothes. Move it!”
“Wait what?” The “d” word had aroused her attention and the messy haired teenager propped her head up leaning on her elbows.
“You need to pack for Dad’s this weekend. Get up.”
“But I have to take diapers?”
“Well of course. Look at yourself.”
Jordan looked down and felt the cold but gel-like mass between her legs and under her butt.
“But I don’t want Dad to have to……and I don’t want him to see….”
“You can do it yourself honey – you’ve seen me do it enough. You’re twelve years old. I think you can handle it this one weekend.”
Still looking a little dazed and confused she said, “…okaaaaay…”, flopping backwards back on the pillow in feigned exhaustion.
“Now up!”
Sally had kept Ted updated about Jordan’s medical progress over the past month or so: the OB/GYN appointment, sleep apnea testing, the GoodNites and then the diapers, the nightly wetting, her theories as to the causes, etc. He had seemed genuinely uninterested and even when she gave him the overall medical update of all three girls before this particular weekend visit – he still waved her details aside as though they were a pesky insect.
“Okay okay, I got it, we’ll be fine.”
But when he arrived that Friday afternoon to pick the two younger girls up, she reminded him about Jordan’s diapers one more time and he perked up with a little more incredulity.
“Don’t you think she’s a little old to be wearing diapers Sally? I mean, I get why you’ve got the five year old prancing around in ’em but the twelve year old too?! I mean did you just say she’s got her period now for Christ sakes?”
“Fine Ted – if you want whatever fancy leather furniture you have leased to get saturated in pee (or blood) leaking out of that twelve year old, be my guest. But in OUR house, we respect what we’ve got and we do what’s practical. That means diapers.”
“Jeez ok. You don’t have to bite my head off…ya battleaxe,” whispering the last word under his breath of earshot. “Now do you really have the 2 year old OUT of diapers too?!? – I wouldn’t say that’s a little backwards but we’ve already been down that road…”
She gave him a death look and he stopped in his tracks.
“Got it. Diapers for the teenager, ‘yes’. Diapers for the toddler, ‘no’. Sure. Makes PERFECT sense.” He said trying to get a rise out of her as he plopped in the car where the two girls awaited.
“Love you girls, have fun and obey your Dad. I’ll see you on Sunday. Call me every night ok?”
“OK MOM!!!” They shouted as Ted rolled up the window.