I wanted to be alone because I needed to come to terms with myself, and my desire to be a girl instead of a boy.
For many years I had felt this longing of being a girl.
It had made me do things that had made my classmates rather suspicious of me.
They had begun teasing me, calling me all sorts of names including sissy.
Even my mom had started to ask me questions like, why had I not cut my hair like she had told me to a million times?
Was it because I wanted to have my hair to look like a girl? and, was it me that had been in her wardrobe?
I denied those accusations strongly and promised to have my hair cut, but I just couldn’t bring myself to go to the barber.
I wanted to have curls in my hair like Madelene, the most beautiful girl in my class, the whole school even.
I so envied of her and all the other girls.
It made my heartache that I was not like them, but I rather plain boy that no one liked.