I meekly thanked the owner and we left the shop. Instinctively I hugged the bag in an attempt to hide the very telling image displayed on each side, but Mother insisted I carry it ‘properly’. I could only hope that no one gave my bag a second glance as we strolled down the busy high street, but even a single glance would reveal its contents to be anything but masculine.
Mother took me in and out of a number of boutiques and department stores before she found a skirt and blouse that she liked. The blouse was a bit girlie, having a bit of frill around the short puffed sleeves and atop its high tube-like collar. The skirt is straight and charcoal grey. Mother had me try it on in the shop, which was an experience I could have done without. Being a fitted, almost tight knee length skirt, I was concerned about my very obvious bulge. “No one will see that when you’ve got your control knickers on William.” Mother informed me. She told me this in a voice far too loud for comfort. I just wanted to get out of there so agreed to her choice of both skirt and blouse (I might have even said ‘nice’). “Yes, it is lovely.” she said with a smile as we headed for the tills. “The high collar will conceal your Adam’s apple… that’ll help you look a little less boyish.” she added, again far too loud for my liking.
I empathised with Vincent and how he must have felt whenever Mother used to take him clothes shopping. At least he was dressed like a girl, was referred to as a girl and pretended he was girl. I’m clearly an average looking teenage guy with a shaving rash and moppish hair, and Mother’s making no secret that it’s me she’s shopping for. The assistant didn’t seem at all phased. I suspected that with with Malham Hall so close by, maybe they’re used to seeing males in the ladies department. I felt a huge weight lift from my shoulders as we left the store with my new outfit. “Right, all we need now is some shoes.” Mother announced.
Doh I’d forgotten about shoes! “I’m sure my old school shoes will still fit.” I suggested, hoping to avoid having to try on women’s shoes in a women’s shoe shop.
Mother said they probably would, “But don’t you think Mary Jane’s are a bit young for such a grown up outfit?” she asked. “You are seventeen Andrew.” she added.
I’m also a man! Albeit a young one, I thought as Mother told me that a nice pair of court shoes is what I need ‘at my age’. Thankfully we found a pair that Mother liked in the very first shoe shop, but it was the fourth pair of shoes I’d tottered back & forth in so it wasn’t what I’d call an easy purchase. I thought the heels on my Mary Jane’s were high enough but on ‘grown up’ shoes they’re a good inch higher, and the heels are much more slender. The sales assistant complimented me on how well I walked as I tried each pair and Mother proudly told her that I’d had plenty of practise. “That wasn’t so bad was it?” Mother said to me as we walked back to the car.
I muttered a non committal “I guess.” I breathed my final sigh of relief when she started the engine and reversed out of the parking space.
We were halfway home when Mother exclaimed “Oh fiddlesticks!”
“What?” I asked.
“A handbag… I completely forgot!” she replied.
“I don’t need a handbag Mother.”
“You’re just going to hold your spare stockings in your hand are you?” she asked.
“I won’t need spare stockings Mother.” I retorted.
Mother told me that I would need my spare stockings, “…and you need something to put a compact, lipstick and a vanity mirror in.” she added in a flustered tone. “You absolutely do need a handbag!”
“Surely I could borrow one of yours?” I suggested. “Or Vincent’s.” I added. “You’ve spent enough already, especially for just one day.”
Mother sighed. “I suppose.” she said. “It’s going to be worth it though, even if it is just for one day.” she added with a smile. “I can’t wait to see you both looking like grown ups.”
“Yeah… grown up girls!” I thought as she drove us through our neighbourhood. We arrived home and Mother wasted no time in showing Vincent what I’d be wearing for his graduation ceremony.