As the days and weeks pass, nothing drastic changes in John’s world. He’s given up asking if he has to get changed every time he returns home and now goes straight to his room and dons whatever is waiting for him. It’s not too long before he finds one of the new play-suits waiting, but thankfully its not the sissified lederhosen or the bunny dungarees. It’s the blue shorts and yellow sleeveless blouse which fastens with a sparse row big yellow buttons up the back. His mother helps him with the buttons, tells him how nice it looks and says, “…you don’t have to worry about flashing your knickers when you’re playing.”“I guess that’s why they call it a play suit?” John rhetorically asked.
“That’s right.” his mother smiled as she looked him up and down. “And it’s a bit more boyish than your dresses don’t you think?”
John dropped his head a focused on the three rows of scalloped trim and the yellow satin belt tied in a floppy bow. “Not really.” he replied. To be honest, John didn’t mind wearing his new play-suits, especially when he realised that there was enough room in the legs which meant he didn’t need his mother to unbutton it every time he needed the bathroom. The blue gingham lederhosen wasn’t quite so convenient though.
It’s half-term when John’s mother suggests redecorating his bedroom and reluctantly John says, “You’re going to make it really girlie aren’t you?”
He gulps as his mother smiles. “Well I wouldn’t say ‘really girlie’.” she replied, raising his hopes a little, “But now you’re starting to enjoy being petticoated…”
“I’m not exactly enjoying this Mum.” he interjects, looking down at his lemon yellow prairie style dress. “I mean… Mummy.” he adds when she gives him one of those looks.
“I know that’s not your favourite dress but you do look nice in yellow.” she tells him. John tells her that he looks like a daffodil. His mother grins and says “Yes, you do a bit.”
“Thanks!” he replies with more than a hint of sarcasm.
“You’re welcome.” his mother replied as John frowned. She reminds him that just like him, his friends all wear ‘nice’ clothes and have ‘nice’ bedrooms too.
“Not all of them.” John claims, before listing a number of non-petticoated friends from both school and the neighbourhood. “I bet they never have to wear a dress.”
“And if they did they’d look just as pretty as you do.” she replied, “…and I notice you didn’t list any of the girls you’re friends with… They all wear nice dresses.”
“Yeah but they’re girls… they’re supposed to wear dresses.” John reminded her.
“And petticoated boys are supposed to wear dresses too.” his mother replied as she began to faff with his frilly collar and the yellow satin sash, making sure it all looked as nice as possible.
“I never used to be petticoated.” John sulked.
“I know… and you never used to look anywhere near as nice as you do now.” she said as she looked him in the eye and smiled. John forced a smile back. “Shall we have a think about your new bedroom?” she said, “What colour do you think it should be?”
“I dunno.” John shrugged as he sat himself down. “Pink I suppose.”
His mother told him that would be nice, but said that it doesn’t have to be pink. “Green or maybe yellow might be nice too.”
His mother makes more suggestions such as curtains with tiebacks and a nice valance, but getting little feedback from her son, she suggests that it might be easier to come up with some ideas once they’ve stripped the old wallpaper off. “You can change into some of your old clothes if you like.”
“Boy’s clothes?” John asked. Apart from his school uniform, it’s been a few weeks since he last dressed as a boy at home (although he does still wear his pyjamas for bed). His mother nodded and offered to unbutton him before letting him go to change. His trusty old jeans and old T shirt feel like a breath of fresh air after the floaty prairie style dress.
“Better?” his mother asks as she enters his bedroom. John smiles and nods. “Good.” she replied, before glancing around his room. “Shall get rid of all this stuff and get started?”
“What?” John gulps. He knew what she meant but he had to ask. His books, comics and magazines were packed into boxes, as were all his other bits and bobs. His bedding was stripped, his curtains came down and the ballerina poster was carefully removed and rolled up. The bed and mattress are tipped on their side and all the furniture is manhandled into the centre of the room. Then, using a bucket of hot soapy water, a big sponge and a couple of scrapers, they began stripping the wallpaper. John would have enjoyed the destruction more if he wasn’t so worried about what his trusty old bedroom might become. He’s grown up in this room and it’s always reflected everything he likes; fast cars, football, fighter planes and computer games. He peels away another big strip of wallpaper and lets it drop onto the carpet, which he notices is getting both wet and messy. “Maybe we should have covered the carpet with something.” he suggests. His mother tells him that that’s a good idea, but she’s thinking of replacing the carpet anyway. “Where am I going to sleep?” John asks as he realises that this process isn’t going to be finished today, or tomorrow for that matter.
“In my room.” his mother replied before telling John that she’s bought him a ‘ready-bed’. They get the walls more or less stripped that day and after a take-away pizza for supper, John’s mother suggests they get his new ready-bed pumped up. “I don’t have to go to bed yet do I?” he asked, noticing the early hour.
“No but you may as well get ready for bed.” she says as she routes out the big foot pump from the cupboard under the stairs. “Why don’t you have a shower whilst I pump your mattress up?”
“Can I do it?” he asks. For a twelve year old boy, using a foot pump is considered a pleasure, not a chore.
“If you insist.” his Mum replied, before packing him off to the shower. Afterwards, he returns wearing his bathrobe to find the deflated ready-bed on his mother’s bedroom floor. It causes his heart to sink. The all-in-one mattress and duvet is adorned with a huge image of Barbie on the cover. The only good thing to say about it is the fact that it’s not a princess one. He says nothing untoward about his as he searches for the inlet valve. Instead, he worries about what sort of dreams he might have, sleeping in such a girlie bed. John’s mother suggests he puts his jim-jams on and presents him with another surprise.“Oh can’t I wear my own pyjamas?” he asked as she unfolds a lilac pyjama set. Predictably, his mother tells him that they are his own pyjamas. “But… Barbie!” he whined. His mother’s reply comes as no surprise when she tells him they match his bed, and he knows he’s not going to get out of wearing them. “At least it not a nightie.” he thinks as he pulls on the cropped pyjama pants with the word ‘Barbie’ peppered all over the lilac fabric. The pyjama top has baseball style ¾ length lilac sleeves and a white torso with a photo print of a Barbie doll wearing an long purple gown and the words ‘dream dress’ in pink italics. He looks down at himself before looking up at his mother’s beaming face. “Aren’t I bit old for Barbie?” he asks. “Girl’s my age don’t wear Barbie stuff.”
“I’m sure some of them do.” his mother replied. “As do plenty of boys.” she claimed.
“Only petticoated ones.” he grumbled as he began pumping up his bed.
“I wasn’t sure if you’d prefer a nightie or pyjamas.” his mother said.
John said that he most definitely prefers pyjamas before pleading, “Please don’t buy me a nightie.”
“Well I’m still waiting for you to say thank you for your pyjamas.” his mother replied. Timidly, John thanks her. “You’re welcome.” his mother says.
It seemed to take ages to fully inflate his bed, but once it was done it was done. He watched an episode of Sherlock Holmes and had a mug of hot chocolate before finally going to bed. In the half-light he could still clearly make out the girlie design on his air-filled camp bed. He began to tremble as he slid himself beneath its pink cover, fearful of the dreams it might bring him. Ever since finding out that his friend Peter was a petticoated boy, his dreams have begun to feature both girls and girl’s clothes more and more frequently, and tonight was no different. He awoke the next morning with a head full of images, and although pleasant whilst dreaming it, this must have been the worst dream so far. He dreamt that his mother had put him in a very pretty lilac dress and fastened a big lilac bow to the back of his head. “Why do I have to wear an apron too Mummy?” he asked as she fastened a frilly white pinafore apron around him. His mother said it was to stop his ‘pretty new dress’ from getting dirty. “But… my apron is far prettier than my dress.” he replied. His mother told him that was all the more reason not to get his ‘pinny’ dirty either, before telling him to ‘run along’. He guiltily recalls the climax of this dream in which he simply turned around and left the house and walked down the street dressed like an extra from Avonlea. It all felt completely normal, even when a skipping rope appeared in his hands. John gulped as he visualised himself, skipping down the street towards the playground, grinning from ear to ear and eager to show off his new dress. He woke up before he got there, but couldn’t help but wonder if he’d have got a positive or negative response from his friends and peers. “Yeah I guess.” he grumbled when his mother asked if he’d slept well.
He ate breakfast in his new barbie pyjamas, but went on to spend the whole day dressed as a boy. They finished stripping the walls, then he helped rub down all the woodwork ready for painting. In the afternoon they went to the large out of town B&Q to choose some new wallpaper. John knew that he’d have little say in the matter. If his mother does give him a choice it’s going to be something like ‘would you prefer Peppa Pig or Snow White’, although he could imagine far worse. They returned home and John was uneasily relieved that his mother hadn’t chosen the worst design they had to offer. He could have ended up with Cinderella or Barbie, the ghastly Peppa Pig or even flower fairies… but as far as all the girlie wallpaper choices went, Alice in Wonderland isn’t so bad. Yes it’s a pale pink and littered with images of Alice in her distinctive blue dress and white apron. It has a sparse scattering of other characters from the story, but it’s mostly Alice; sitting, walking, skipping, tumbling, sleeping, kneeling and falling. Strangely, his mother chose a light/bright green shade for the woodwork, but John didn’t complain.
John was looking forward to doing some of the painting, but on his arrival home from a trip to the cinema on Monday afternoon he discovered that his mother had done it all. He’d been to watch Around the World in Eighty Days with Peter, Paul, Andrew and Nigel. It was the first time they’d all been together since the bowling alley and John reluctantly told them that he’s having his bedroom decorated. “What like?” Nigel asked.
“Well…” John frowned. “We’re not supposed to talk about it.” he said, before briefly mentioning the Alice in Wonderland wallpaper.
“Could be worse.” Nigel shrugged. “I’ve got Disney Princesses.”
Since their petticoated lives are a taboo subject, the conversation ended there. But John had so many questions that he needed to ask them, and the most burning one is What happens when a petticoated boy goes on holiday? His mother has mentioned a week in a B&B somewhere and did buy him all those play-suits which would be ‘nice for the beach’. He could always ask his mother, but fears that he won’t like the answer. “Then again…” he thinks, realising that his friends would give him the same answer.
On Tuesday his mother hung the wall paper and John was beginning to get a real feel for how his new bedroom will look, and it didn’t feel good. With all the furniture stacked up in the middle of the floor and the old carpet spatted with paint, paste and bits of paper, his mother suggests putting his bed against a different wall, his wardrobe behind the door, his chest over there and his bookshelves opposite his bed, “And maybe we could put a dressing table in the window.” she added.
“I don’t want a dressing table!” John blurted. His mother justified this idea by claiming that it’s just a desk and would be somewhere that he can sit and do his homework.
“I suppose.” he conceded. “What colour’s the carpet going to be?” he asked.
“I’m not sure yet, either pink to match the walls or green to match the woodwork.” his mother replied. “I thought you might prefer that.” his mother smiled after John sided with the green option.
John spent five nights in total sleeping in his Barbie ready-bed on his mother’s bedroom floor. The Barbie baseball pyjamas were one of three sets of girl’s Pjs his mother had bought him, and on Thursday he woke up wearing the red & white Minnie Mouse set. His mother let him dress as a boy since the carpet fitters are due to fit his new bedroom carpet today. After stacking all his furniture in the landing, they removed his old carpet and fitted a new one. He and his mother had been effectively confined to the lower floor whilst the work went on and his mother was asked upstairs when the new carpet had been laid and the furniture was ready to go back in. John remained downstairs whilst his mother instructed the men what needs to go where, then once the landing was clear, she asked John to come and have a look.
“It’s pink.” John moaned.
“Yes.” his mother said.
“It may not be your thing ‘sonny’ but I’m sure your little sister will love it.” one of the carpet fitters said. “Oh, err… OK.” he added in a most bemused tone when informed that this is John’s room.
The carpet fitters left and his mother saw them to the door. John glumly looked around his new bedroom. “So… what do you think?” his mother asked when she returned.
“I don’t like it.” John whined. “It’s too girlie.” he claimed. “Can we bring my stuff back in?” he asked, hoping his own possessions would detract from the girlie walls and carpet.
“Well we need to have a good sort through all your stuff first.” his mother said. “But why don’t you put one of your dresses on? I’m sure you’ll feel more at home once you’re out of those tatty old boy clothes.”
John didn’t really want to change out of his boy clothes, but he knows when a suggestion is really an instruction. His mother chose a lime green dress with short puffed sleeves and a white Peter Pan collar. She told him to wear it with a pair of his knee socks and left him to change whilst she fetched some clean bedding. “That’s better.” his mother smiled when she returned to find him wearing the dress. “Now you look like you belong.”
John looked down at his pretty green frock and gulped. He wouldn’t like to admit it but he feels likes he belongs too. He helped his mother fit a white sheet to the mattress, then stood back as she effortlessly fitted the duvet cover. “Is that new?” he asked.
“Of course.” his mother replied. “There’s no point having a new room without new bedding is there?” she asked as she spread it over the mattress. Like his wallpaper, it’s pale pink but instead of being peppered with pictures of Alice and other characters from Wonderland, it’s peppered with numerous ballerina silhouettes. Whilst not ideal, it’s better than the Barbie ready-bed he’s been sleeping in for the last few nights. His mother puts up a new pair of curtains that match his new duvet cover, then she adds a pink girlie lampshade, a girl’s bedside lamp and a pink plastic alarm clock, waste paper basket and a laundry basket to the ensemble. Then, much to John’s displeasure, they sort through all his stuff and his mother puts pretty much everything he’d like to keep in a box for the charity shop, leaving him with a handful of kids books, a few old toys & games and not much else.
It was weird going to sleep in his new bedroom that night. Part of him felt he was staying at someone else’s house, but then he kept unwillingly reminding himself that this is his room, before gulping and closing his eyes again. He had the very same feeling when he awoke the next day; he must be in someone else’s house… but he quickly realised that this is his new room. He threw off his pale pink duvet cover and sat himself up before standing up and opening his pink ballerina curtains. He sighed as he cast his eyes over his Alice in Wonderland wallpaper and wondered if it really was the best of the bad bunch of the available girlie wall coverings. He looked down at his pyjamas and wondered what his friends would say if they could see him now… not friends like Peter, Paul, Andrew or Nigel, but his other friends; the ones who don’t have a room full of girlie stuff. Today’s pyjamas are also cut in the baseball style with cropped pants and sleeves, a scooped neck and contrasting sleeves and torso. But unlike his lilac & white Barbie ‘dream dress’ set and his red & white Minnie mouse set, today he’s wearing his pink & white set featuring the three Disney Princesses; Cinderella, Aurora and Belle printed on the front of the top and the iconic Disney castle peppered all over his pale pink cropped pants.
John’s mother takes him into town to deliver the boxes which contain the very last items of his old boy stuff to one of the charity shops before dragging him around all the others. “Why don’t you you see if there’s any nice books or toys whilst I look at the clothes?” she suggests. John does spot some decent looking books, but at almost thirteen, he’s long grown out of toys. His mother joins him when he’s browsing the videos and asks if he’s seen anything ‘nice’. He points out a book about survival and outdoor pursuits, and the Indiana Jones box set he’s holding, but his mother isn’t taken with them. Instead of buying him things that he wants, he gets things that she wants him to have. He leaves with a Flower Fairies picture book, a Sparkle Girl colouring book and an old Girls Own Adventure Stories book. It doesn’t stop there and by the time they arrive home, he’s got a good selection of girlie books including stories such as A Little Princess, Mallory Towers, Anne of Green Gables. His mother also bought him an assortment of picture books filled with princesses, fairies, flowers, ponies and kittens, as well as some ‘how-to’ craft books and a flower press. He puts all these new items on his bookshelf and knows he’ll probably never look through any of them.
It’s not just books though, as on his top shelf now sits a rag-doll in a ballerina costume, a cuddly winged unicorn with sparkly pink wings and another doll wearing in a floral prairie dress, white apron and bonnet. Possibly worst charity shop find of all is a Disney Princess video box set containing Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, Cinderella, The Little Mermaid, Tangled, Jasmine`s Enchanted Tales, Mulan, Pocahontas, The Princess And The Frog, Disney Princess Enchanted Tales and the Interactive Disney Princess DVD Quiz. And to make this collection doubly poor, when the boxes are arranged in the correct order, their spines create a single image of all eleven princesses. John steps back and perches on the end of his bed and just stares at his bookshelf. Yesterday it was practically empty but now it’s half full of girl’s books, DVDs and those bog awful cuddly toys on the top shelf. His mother appears in the doorway and says “It’s starting to look like a petticoated boy’s room should look now isn’t it?”
“Yeah I suppose.” John frowned. He looked down at himself, clad in the outfit his mother had laid out for him; the dreaded blue gingham lederhosen with its frilly lace trim and its prissy white blouse. He wears white knee high pop-socks and a pair of pale blue Mary Jane’s.
His mother asks him to stand as she’s not ‘properly’ seen him wearing it. “It’s very nice.” she tells him and he reluctantly and slowly twirls before suggesting that wearing a play-suit must be a welcome change from wearing a dress.
John gulps and looks down at himself. “I think I prefer my dresses.” he confesses.
“Of course you do… that’s just for playing in.” his mother said. She had a final glance around his new girlie bedroom before leaving him alone. John sat on the edge of his girlie bed and cast his mind back to the day he first entered Peter’s room. He recalled how utterly appalling it was and the look of utter shame on Peter’s face. Now his own bedroom is twice as girlie as Peter’s room and John dreads the day that one of his non-petticoated friends decides to call round unannounced.