I cannot remember the events immediately after, but I do remember ending up in the sick bay with a teacher not knowing what to do with me. The memory of what actually happened is absent. I can vaguely recall this happening to me many times during these years and I would end up, each time in the sick bay. There were many times when I had terrible anxiety attacks.
I became increasingly depressed during this time and felt more and more alone. I can remember very clearly, feeling that I did not matter and I can clearly recall beginning to believe that I was worthless. I began to feel suicidal, which I kept secret from everyone.
I cannot recall any more about those first two years at that school.