I agree wholeheartedly with you that abuse should be jumped upon from a great height at all times. Where I must disagree though is that a child must never be physically punished. It does them no good to know that they are ‘fire-proof’ and no one must touch them.
I always use the analogy of driving rules and penalties. How many of us would bother about speed limits or drink-drive laws if they were ‘for guidance only’? No, it’s the penalty of losing your license and the fines imposed that stop most – if not all – drivers. In other words, it’s the fear factor that makes us behave reasonably well on our roads.
Now if a child fears nothing and can see no detrimental consequences of misbehavior he/she has no incentive to behave in a reasonable way – or perhaps that should be, a deterrent not to do so.