When I was in the first form, the woodwork master punished latecomers with a couple of whacks on the bum, with a specially selected block of wood. (The block was bigger for each successive form in the school, starting with a little whacker for first formers and leading up to a rather fearsome implement for fifth formers.)

No record was kept of these whackings – so nothing would find its way on to the end-of-term report and earn me a good hiding from my mother.

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