“Hi Clare.

Am I too early?”

“No, I’m just getting things ready.”

As I speak, I’ve just finished clearing the center of the room.

“There, we’ll use that,” I say, as I place my carefully selected chair right in the middle of the space I’ve cleared.

“That’s what they’re going to have to… um…?” Joanna asks.

“That’s right.” I answer.

“It’s just the right height so that when they’re bending over you’ll be able to get a really good swing at their bottoms.”

“Oh dear, I’m already feeling quite nervous.”

“There’s absolutely no need.

You’ll be fine and I shall be right here guiding you all the way.”

“But, how hard should I hit them?”

“As hard as you can, Joanne.”

I enjoy saying that.

“They’re only getting eight.

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