“I see.” Joanne says from somewhere behind me. “Knickers, Clare?”
Oh ! “Er, yes, Joanna.
The girls will be getting it across the seat of their knickers.
That’s been agreed.”
“Well, if they’re going to be whacked across the seat of their knickers,
shouldn’t I practice with you the same?
To make it realistic, I mean.”
“No time, Joanna.
They’ll be here any second.”
“Oh.” She sounds disappointed. “Okay.”
Within two seconds something,
I presume the size twelve slipper I’ve just handed Joanne,
swipes me full force across my backside.
“Ouch!!”
“Oh dear, was that too hard?”
Joanne asks.
“No, no that was fine.”