With the TV still on I settled down in the computer chair, but then I thought about the fact that my back was going to be to the room. If someone came in without me hearing them while I was looking at that site… well, let’s just say that I didn’t want that to happen. So I got back up, turned off the TV, turned off the lights to the room and closed the door. That way if Grandmother happens to poke her head in and sees that the lights are out she might think I am gone. At any rate, it would give me another second or two to get the site closed down before she or someone else realized I was actually in the room. However, it was only paranoia because neither Grandmother nor anyone else for that matter came to check on me. I was able to while away the rest of the afternoon alone in the Media Room. I did play some of the computer games that I found on the computer, but not until after I had fully checked out that site.
The first thing I did after logging into ild.com was check any new messages. There were three, one more from BB-N2-TB-DL and two from Sissy4U. I decided to read those before considering if I would reply to either one of them.
TO: TigerFish
FROM: Sissy4U
I see you just logged off. I hope I didn’t scare you away.
Love Sissy4U
TO: TigerFish
FROM: Sissy4U
I sure hope you come back soon.
Love Sissy4U
TO: TigerFish
FROM: BB-N2-TB-DL
Hi again TigerFish! I just thought of something else I should have said in my other PM. I should have told you about me. Most of the important stuff is listed in my profile. Check it out sometime and if you ever want to chat let me know when and I’ll meet you in the ILD.com 1 chat room. If you like, we can go private so that no one else sees what we’re saying to one another. Hope to see you around ILD.com 1.
Baby Bruce
I decided before I would reply, I’d take some time to check out the rest of the site. The first place I went to was the pictures again. I was having such a hard time believing that so many guys and girls my age were into diapers. There was an entire series of pictures of this one guy who looked to be maybe a year or two older than me. There were pictures of him in diapers, pajamas with the booty-feet-things attached, cloth diapers, baby diapers, and even a few huge diapers that looked totally impractical, but comical too. However, in all the pictures his face was hidden by a pillow, a hat or a teddy bear or some other object. It wasn’t until later, when I was checking out Baby Bruce’s profile, that I discovered that those pictures were all of him. By reading his profile information I discovered, that he had listed himself as being twelve, gay, and in a long term relationship with PampersBoy, whatever that was supposed to mean.
You know, it’s a really good thing that people can’t hear what you are thinking because as I was reading his profile and then the profile of PampersBoy I couldn’t help, but think, “Great, there are queer diaper wearing boys that live somewhere around here.” Coming from California, I like to think of myself as fairly open minded about stuff like that however, it also sort of creeps me out. I mean guys with guys—it doesn’t seem right to me. Then again, who am I to judge what’s right and what’s not?
The stories section was kind of creepy at first. There were a few hundred stories listed and I started to read a couple, but they were way-way out there; I’m talking totally bizarre!
Finally, I decided that I wanted to go into the chat room, however, when I did there wasn’t anyone else in there. I wasn’t sure if there was maybe more than one chat room so I decided, that since Baby Bruce had offered, I’d go ahead and reply to his Private Messages and ask him how the Chat Room worked.
TO: BB-N2-TB-DL
FROM: TigerFish
Hello Baby Bruce! I appreciate the heads-up about Sissy4U and to be honest, she did freak me out a little at first. So how does the chat thing work? I checked it out, but no one was there. Did I go to the right chat room? Do you really wear diapers? Does anyone know? Sorry if I’m asking a lot of questions.
I sent the Private Message and decided to check out the section entitled Diaper Boys Only, but as soon as I clicked on it, I got another notification, “You have 1 new private messages. Click here to read private messages.”
I clicked and saw that it was another message from Baby Bruce which I opened right away.
TO: TigerFish
FROM: BB-N2-TB-DL
Wow! I must have just missed you in the chat room. I’m in there right now if you would like to talk.
Baby Bruce
Before I could get scared and log off again I clicked on the Chat Room link. Yep, Baby Bruce was in there alone waiting for me.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Hi TigerFish
TigerFish: Hi
BB-N2-TB-DL: Mind if I call you TF for short?
TigerFish: It’s all cool.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Let’s take this private so that we won’t be interrupted. OK?
TigerFish: If you say so. I’ve no idea how to do that.
Before I knew it another smaller window popped open with a large red padlock in the upper right corner.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Anything we say in this private chat will only be seen by you and me. Not even Daddy_Phil or Mommy_Beth can see private chats.
TigerFish: OK.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Sorry that Sissy4U scared you. But if you get to know her, you’ll see that she is nice and can be funny too.
TigerFish: OK.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Let me guess. This is your first time visiting a site like ILD.com 1?
TigerFish: Yes.
BB-N2-TB-DL: I understand. I’ve been coming here for a long time, but I can still remember how scared I was the first time I ever did a Google search on the word ‘Diaper’.
TigerFish: Oh, hadn’t tried that yet.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Really?
BB-N2-TB-DL: Mind if I ask how you found ILD.com 1 then? Oh and we have a rule here at ILD.com 1, if at any time anyone asks you a question or is bothering you in any way, all you have to do is type TAG all in caps and they will stop. If they don’t then if there are others in the chat they will get them off your back for you. Everybody watches out for everybody here. If you are alone with that person and they don’t stop then leave the chat room and send an email to Daddy_Phil and Mommy_Beth. They will take care of it for you.
TigerFish: Wow! OK. Good to know.
TigerFish: It’s a long story about how I got this website address, but the short version is that someone walked up to me and handed it to me.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Ok, someday you have to tell me the whole story because that sounds interesting. but not right now.
TigerFish: OK
Bruce began to show me how the different parts of the chat room worked. He also showed me how to set any member to ignore, so that I didn’t even have to read what he or she was writing. All in all Bruce was a thorough, but very pleasant teacher.
BB-N2-TB-DL: OK, now for your other questions that you asked me.
TigerFish: OK
BB-N2-TB-DL: Yes, I really do wear diapers, but unlike many on this site, I don’t wear them because I have to. I wear them because I like to.
TigerFish: Really?
BB-N2-TB-DL: Yes really. I take it, that I am the first person you have ever talked to, that wears diapers for enjoyment?
TigerFish: Yes
BB-N2-TB-DL: You ok?
TigerFish: Yeah, I think so.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Remember if at any time you want me to stop all you have to do is type TAG. Also if you don’t want to answer any question you can just type PASS.
TigerFish: OK
BB-N2-TB-DL: Can I ask you a question?
TigerFish: I guess
BB-N2-TB-DL: Since you are visiting a diaper site, does that mean you wear diapers too?
TigerFish: PASS
BB-N2-TB-DL: OK, that’s totally cool.
BB-N2-TB-DL: I’ll go back to your questions then.
TigerFish: OK
BB-N2-TB-DL: There are only a couple people that know that I like to wear diapers in the real world. Do you know what I mean when I say ‘real world’?
TigerFish: Yes
BB-N2-TB-DL: OK, good.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Now that you’ve registered, there are six of us on this site that are from Lewiston and out of those six; I’ve met three of them in the real world.
BB-N2-TB-DL: And before you ask. I’ll tell you which ones.
BB-N2-TB-DL: PampersBoy, Diapered4Life and Sissy4U
TigerFish: But in her private Message, Sissy4U said, that she didn’t wear diapers.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Oh ok. I didn’t know she told you. That is true. Sissy is more like our big sister, but she is totally cool with those of us that wear diapers whether for fun or for need.
TigerFish: OK
BB-N2-TB-DL: Just so you know, PampersBoy has to wear diapers because he wets the bed. He wouldn’t mind me telling you. If he was here right now he’d tell you himself.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Diapered4Life is a guy too and he has to wear diapers at night and special underwear during the day. However, I don’t think it is my place to tell you why.
TigerFish: OK
BB-N2-TB-DL: When you meet Diapered4Life in this chat he’ll probably tell you himself. He’s a bit of a livewire, but for those of us that know him, we just let him vent whenever he gets worked up.
TigerFish: OK
TigerFish: There was another name that I saw.
BB-N2-TB-DL: You mean Wet_Dwaggy?
TigerFish: Yes, I think that was the name.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Well, none of us have ever met him in the real world. Well, not that we know of.
TigerFish: What’s that mean?
BB-N2-TB-DL: It means that Wet_Dwaggy doesn’t want to meet anyone for real. He’s strictly an online person.
TigerFish: Is he your friend too?
BB-N2-TB-DL: Well, we’ve talked before, but I wouldn’t say we are friends. He’s very hard to get to know, but…
TigerFish:, but?
BB-N2-TB-DL: Well we (PampersBoy, Diapered4Life, Sissy4U and me) think we might have figured out who he is, but we’d never out him.
TigerFish: Out him?
BB-N2-TB-DL: Um, we’d never approach him in the real world and confront him. Even if we are correct, it’s his right to remain secretive if he wants to.
TigerFish: That’s good to know.
BB-N2-TB-DL: And to set your mind at ease.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Even if I knew who you were in the real world, I’d never say anything to you about your diapers unless you were cool with it.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Not that I’m saying you wear them. I’m just saying that I wouldn’t embarrass you or anyone else that way. None of us would.
TigerFish: OK
BB-N2-TB-DL: You sure don’t say much, do you?
TigerFish: Sorry
BB-N2-TB-DL: Don’t be. It’s all good.
TigerFish: Who are Daddy_Phil and Mommy_Beth?
BB-N2-TB-DL: Good Question. Like I said before, they run this site and they take care of all the boys and girls that come here. They are very good about keeping out the pervos too.
TigerFish: What’s a pervos?
BB-N2-TB-DL: It means bad people. Pervos is short for Perverts.
TigerFish: How can they do that? I mean it was super easy for me to register. How do they know I am not a pervos?
BB-N2-TB-DL: I don’t know how they do it, but they do. A couple weeks ago we had some guy in here pretending to be a teen girl that wore diapers. But Mommy_Beth knew right away that he was lying and banished him.
TigerFish: Banished?
BB-N2-TB-DL: She blocked him somehow so that he cannot get back into ILD.com 1 again.
TigerFish: That’s cool
BB-N2-TB-DL: Any more questions?
TigerFish: Can’t think of any right now.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Well if you do, feel free to ask me anything anytime.
TigerFish: OK
BB-N2-TB-DL: And anytime you need or want to talk to me privately like we’re doing now, just say so.
TigerFish: OK
TigerFish: I just thought of another question
BB-N2-TB-DL: Sure, let me hear it.
TigerFish: I found your pictures on the site, but always your face is hidden.
BB-N2-TB-DL: There’s a good reason for that.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Take a look at the other pictures again. Any photos that are linked to a profile do not show anyone’s face. That is one of Daddy_Phil and Mommy_Beth’s rules. It’s to protect minors (that’s you and me) from the pervos.
TigerFish: That’s good
BB-N2-TB-DL: I actually had some of me with my face showing, but Daddy_Phil deleted them.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Oh and while I am thinking about it. All photos that are uploaded are screened by Daddy_Phil or Mommy_Beth before they appear on the site. That way no one can post anything to the site that is bad, like nude pictures or under-age kids.
TigerFish: Are there other’s that come to this site that wear diapers because they enjoy them like you?
BB-N2-TB-DL: Yes, but I don’t know how many.
TigerFish: Are there more members close to us that are not in our town?
BB-N2-TB-DL: Yes, there are a lot in the state and there are members from all over the world.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Hang on for a second ok?
TigerFish: OK
BB-N2-TB-DL: Hey, LilPrince is in the chat room all alone. Would you like to go back into the chat room and meet him?
TigerFish: Sure, how do I do it?
BB-N2-TB-DL: Just close this window and you will automatically return to the chat room.
TigerFish: OK
BB-N2-TB-DL: LilPrince, meet TigerFish. TF is brand new to this site as of today.
LilPrince: Hi TF
TigerFish: Hello LilPrince
BB-N2-TB-DL: TF, LilPrince is Daddy_Phil and Mommy_Beth’s real son.
TigerFish: Wow! Really? That must be cool.
LilPrince: Yep! Yep! Yep! That is me! Yep! Yep! Yep!
BB-N2-TB-DL: LilPrince is also very hyper.
LilPrince: Hey! Am not! Am not! Am not!
LilPrince: What does TigerFish mean? It sounds cool like it is tribal or something.
TigerFish: Uh, I rather not say.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Remember TF, if you don’t want to answer all you have to say is PASS.
TigerFish: Oh yeah, thanks.
LilPrince: 
TigerFish: What is that?
LilPrince: Me sticking my tongue out at you. Hehe!
BB-N2-TB-DL: LP, be nice or I will tell.
LilPrince:
TigerFish: I know a comeback for that, but probably shouldn’t say it.
LilPrince: SAY IT! SAY IT!
BB-N2-TB-DL: He’s asking for it, so let him have it TF. LOL!
TigerFish: No thanks I use toilet paper!
LilPrince: HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!
BB-N2-TB-DL: FOTFLMAO! Too funny TF!
The three of us talked for another twenty minutes or longer before LilPrince had to go.
LilPrince: Mommy says time to eat.
BB-N2-TB-DL: ok LilPrince, don’t choke!
TigerFish: Bye LilPrince. Glad I met you.
LilPrince: I am more glad I met you. Yep! Yep! Yep!
Again Baby Bruce and I were alone in the chat room.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Hey TF?!
TigerFish: Yeah?
BB-N2-TB-DL: Can we go private again for a minute?
TigerFish: I guess so.
Before I knew it the private chat window popped up and Baby Bruce was messaging me.
BB-N2-TB-DL: I wanted to tell you something, but I didn’t want to do so in the open chat room.
TigerFish: OK
BB-N2-TB-DL: Now, before I tell you this I want you to remember that I totally respect your privacy and I’d never out you in the real world. OK?
TigerFish: OK
BB-N2-TB-DL: Now, I don’t know what school you go to, but I’m guessing that maybe we go to the same school. And like I said I am not trying to freak you out or anything. I’m just saying that there is a school dance tomorrow at my school and if we really do go to the same school and if you want to see what I look like for real, without worrying about me finding out who you are, I wanted to tell you that I will be wearing a bright blue button up shirt with a red collar and I will have on blue flappers.
TigerFish: What are flappers?
BB-N2-TB-DL: Do you know what Converse are?
TigerFish: Yes
BB-N2-TB-DL: Flappers are Converse shoes without laces
TigerFish: OK
TigerFish: How do you keep them on?
BB-N2-TB-DL: LOL! That’s why they call them flappers. Because they are always flapping around and falling off.
TigerFish: I’ll keep my laces, thank you.
BB-N2-TB-DL: LOL
BB-N2-TB-DL: Anyway, now you know what to look for if you want to see what I really look like. That is if we go to the same school like I think we do.
TigerFish: OK.
BB-N2-TB-DL: But keep that between you and me. Mommy_Beth might not take too kindly to me being so forward especially with a newbie.
TigerFish: OK
When I didn’t say anything for a minute or two Baby Bruce started to get the idea, that he might have overstepped the line with me. I’m not sure if he did or not. I mean, I wasn’t sure what to think about all this. It all seemed kind of weird and almost like it wasn’t real. Like it was make-believe or something.
BB-N2-TB-DL: You okay over there?
TigerFish: Yes
BB-N2-TB-DL: You got quiet again.
TigerFish: Did I?
BB-N2-TB-DL: I hope it wasn’t because of what I said about the dance and all.
TigerFish: Truth?
BB-N2-TB-DL: Yes please.
TigerFish: A little.
BB-N2-TB-DL: You feeling overwhelmed or scared?
TigerFish: Yeah, think maybe I am.
BB-N2-TB-DL: It’s ok. You’re allowed.
TigerFish: OK
BB-N2-TB-DL: Do you want to keep chatting or do you feel like you need some time to think?
TigerFish: Don’t know
BB-N2-TB-DL: I understand.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Want to talk about something other than diapers or this site?
TigerFish: I guess
BB-N2-TB-DL: Hmmm, are you into any hobbies?
TigerFish: Yes
BB-N2-TB-DL: Like what?
I thought about his question for a moment before I typed my response.
TigerFish: PASS
BB-N2-TB-DL: Alright then.
TigerFish: What’s your favorite TV show.
And that question lead the two of us off on another long private conversation. Before I knew it Mom and John were home and apparently they were a little alarmed that they couldn’t find me. I could hear them calling for me upstairs.
TigerFish: I got to go.
BB-N2-TB-DL: OK
TigerFish: parents are home.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Great talking with you.
TigerFish: Same here.
BB-N2-TB-DL: Bye now.
TigerFish: See you at the dance.
And with that final line from me I quickly exited the chat before he could reply back. I knew I’d just given away to him that we did go to the same school, but I felt safe in knowing that I’d be able to pick him out of the crowd, but he wouldn’t be able to single me out.