All the memories of nanny lee slippering me are very vauge to say the
least. I do remember a time when she spanked me with
grandads slipper ( I think grandads slipper was alittle bit boring as
it didnt have any floral design on it and was normally brown
God bless him he wasnt the most interesting person in the world . He
was always going on about the war , and he read the Daily Mirror as
if it was a bible , he had his own seat that no one was aloud to sit
in and was stone deaf . Oh yes and by the way he was always giving me
bloody lectures apart from that he was a nice bloke and i loved him
lots. Im not being disrespectful to my elders here (Well Not Much )
But The thing is about that generation is they dont make them like
that anymore (Thank fuckin god). The fact I was a punk rocker really
went down like a sack of shit with my family , especially the older
generation . I once left my Jacket at my nam and grandads and it had
no less than A Never Mind The Bollocks Heres The Sex Pistols Badge on
it and when my grandad saw it he hit the roof and it my long
suffering who copped the bollocking for it.
I think the worse thing i ever did as far as my grandad concerned
his hearing aid which i nearly one day blew up along with him.
One sunny sunday afternoon at 100 Meadlands Drive Petersham surrey
( I dont live there anymore by the way)Nan and grandad came round for
sunday tea . As always Nanny was wearing floral slippers with fur
round them and was Knitting something ridiculous . Grandad Howeverwas
talking shit ( Now you know where i get it from),No , sorry , I meant
he was talking about the war.
At the age of five I was always intrigued by grandads hearing aid as
it was one of these hearing aids that came out of the ark. This day I
was standing by grandad chair and questioning him about his hearing
aid with such questions such as “Grandad you boring bald headed
bastard with poo coloured trousers, how does your hearing aid work?”
No , ok I didnt say im telling porkies but then again I am on the
internet and as there are alot of Mistruth on the net , especially in
chatrooms , Like “Spanking Chat com” and “Uk Us Sub dom so if you
cant beat them join them.
Ok so he explained to me how this contraption works.
Now to describe my grandads hearing aid it was one of these that had
an ear piece and a wire which run into some part of his body . I
think it was whch part of his body it run into that was a major
source of my attention. He expalined that it run into his Jumper into
a little box that had a microphone in it.Now grandad had a habbit of
wearing these great big wolly jumpers that Nanny knitted for him
which would always be brown and basically would prevent the hearing
aid from working peoperly, Which was probably the reason why we
always had to shout at him.
So there he was explaining about his hearing and he said that i could
speak into the little box in his jumper.
So there i was saying “Hello Grandad” in his hearing aid box , and i
thought this was fantastic , the fact i could walk up to my grandad
and say hello without shouting at him. So for the next five minutes i
was talking to grandad through his jumper.I soon got tied of this and
i went out to play. I dont know what came over me or made me do this
but i went back to Grandads Hearing aid and shouted “HELLO GRANDAD”
in it which basically blew him out of his seat. I was never to be
forgiven for this and i was reminded of the event that took place
that day right up untill he passed away In 1993.
