The Journey Home was nothing spectacular, in that nothing too different happened to the journey into town.
Nanny Mitchel continued to waffle on about everything and anything, whilst myself and cousin Karen did our best to be seen and not heard.
Having quickly mastered the art of earwigging from my cousin Karen, I did however overhear a conversation about the shop assistant Sandra at the bus stop.
“That shop assistant’s face was familiar Dorothy,” began Aunty Shirley. “Where do you know her from?”
“Oh,” replied Nanny Mitchel, fairly surprised at the question Aunty Shirley had just asked,” That is Sandra she lives next door.”
“Really Dorothy, Well I never,” replied Aunty Shirley pretending to be surprised.
The truth of this questioning from Aunty Shirley was possibly far more sinister.
Why she had asked the question in the first place was beyond comprehension, for it was possible she already knew Sandra the shop assistant was Nanny Mitchels, next-door neighbor.
It appeared that whilst in the school outfitters, the ever-devious Christian Aunty Shirley had been eyeing Sandra the shop assistant up and had taken a shine to her.
Little did we all know that other things had gone through Aunty Shirley’s mind whilst eyeing Sandra up, some of which were far from Christian.
In my little mind, I had already managed to figure out that a lot of women of that generation really did not like men.
I always wondered to myself, why, if women like Nanny Mitchel and Aunty Shirley were so against men, why did they get married to them?
In truth, it was because it was expected of them.
Myself and Cousin Karen gave each other one of our telepathic psychic looks as if to say we knew what was going on.
Cousin Karen whispered in my ear.
“Aunty Shirley has a crush on Sandra.”
A little smile came to my face and I giggled.
It now appeared that during my transformation I had taken on the traits of a girl and now was giggling like one.
However, this giggle was to come to Nanny Mitchels Attention.
“Stop messing around you two,” barked Nanny Mitchel, once again showing off her authority over us to Aunty Shirley. “Patricia Stop giggling, and Karen you can stop whispering,” continued Nanny Mitchel, further lecturing Karen on how rude it was to whisper.
However, there was no getting away from it.
What the ever-astute cousin Karen had told me, was one hundred percent the truth.
Aunty Shirley had a Crush on Sandra.
If this was not enough, there was something else that was to be proven true.
Myself and cousin Karen had yet to work this out, but it appeared that Nanny Mitchel had a crush on Mrs Hegitey
Cousin Karen had already worked out in her own mind that Mrs Hegitey was a Witch.
She had told me this whilst us two waiting for Nanny Mitchel in the corridor of the shoe shop.
However, there were a lot more revelations to come at a later date.
Some of which would really question Aunty Shirleys Christian faith.
After Nanny Mitchel had finished issuing her reprimand to myself and Cousin Karen, for some reason only known to herself she decided to split us both up.
This possibly could have been that between us both we knew too much.
Or failing that in our little minds we had worked out too much.
For the remainder of the journey, we were told we were to be seen and not heard.
We were also told that if we did not do this on arrival home we would both be smacked and sent to bed early.
It was at this time, whilst my cousin Karen and I were being warned and threatened with a smack, that the ever increasingly weird Aunty Shirley remembered Nanny Mitchels earlier slip of the tongue whilst in the town.
Nanny Mitchel had briefly mentioned something about Mrs Hegitey demonstrating her discipline techniques on her, only to quickly change the subject when she realized what a clanger she had dropped.
Once again Aunty Shirley had stored this in her memory.
However, now was not the time or the place to pursue the matter any further.
Especially not in front of myself and cousin Karen.
This conversation would take place at a later date.
Finally, and with some great relief to myself and cousin Karen the bus arrived.
This would mean that the whole somewhat sordid shopping trip was nearly over.
However, it goes without saying that the day’s events were not going to end there.
The bus ride was to provide further food for thought.
As we sat down on the bus, with me sat next to Nanny Mitchel and Cousin Karen sat next to Aunty Shirley, I heard some familiar voices in the background calling me names.
“Peter you Pansy”, came an unmistakable whisper of what appeared to be one of the school bullies.
“Has Nanny got you fairy cakes?” came another jibe from the main bully’s counterpart and follower.
“Nice dress Pansy Peter, wish I had one,” came a further jibe.
“Peter Pansy the Spassy,” came another unkind jibe.
The two bullies were obviously foolish enough to think that all their insults were out of Nanny Mitchel’s earshot.
However, she had heard every one of them and was going more and more red in the face to the point of explosion.
Personally, she would of liked to put them both over her knee and thrash the living daylights out of them.
However, even back then, she knew this was not possible.
Nanny Mitchel sensed that I was becoming more and more uncomfortable with this constant teasing, and this made her far from happy.
Finally, she could hold back no more.
“Why don’t you two just expletive off?” screamed nanny Mitchel.
Whoops a daisy, another clanger from Nanny Mitchel.
One that not only shocked myself, cousin Karen, and Aunty Shirley, but one that also shocked the school bullies who fell silent.
Back then it was unheard of for anyone of that generation to use such language, especially a lady.
However, it was obvious that Nanny Mitchel had been pushed to the brink.
There was no way she was going to put up with members of her family being harassed in such a manner.
The bus conductor had overheard all this and immediately came over to see what the commotion was all about.
Nanny Mitchel, who was still in a state of fury at the insults was now also a little bit embarrassed by letting rip with expletives
Even if they were justified, she thought to herself, a lady should not use such language, especially not in front of the young or in public.
As well as this it did not set a good example to either myself or my cousin Karen.
It was at this point Aunty Shirley once again took the lead.
She explained to the bus conductor that the two boys behind had been making unkind remarks aimed at us all.
“Have they now,” said the bus conductor. “Right, you two off the bus now! continued the bus conductor.
Once the bullies were unceremonial thrown off the bus, they became brave again with their abuse.
“Silly Cow,” one of them shouted out.
“We will get you Monday,” shouted out the chief bully.
Not if I don’t get you first thought Nanny Mitchel to herself.
Aunty Shirley so wanted to correct Nanny Mitchel on her misuse of expletives, however once again she thought to herself, not in front of young company.
Instead of this, she made another mental note in her memory of the present situation.
Further to this she was now too invite herself around to Nanny Mitchels house.
